Florida Man Arrested for Masturbating at the Beach and Making Animal Sounds | Riptide 2.0 | Miami | Miami New Times | The Leading Independent News Source in Miami, Florida
Navigation

Florida Man Arrested for Masturbating at the Beach and Making Animal Sounds

What ultimately sets man apart from the rest of the animal kingdom is our ability to attract mates in ways others than hooting, hollering and making other loud noises. We have highly evolved strategies like pick up lines, paying for drinks, and buying fancy cars and clothes to impress women.Apparently...
Share this:

What ultimately sets man apart from the rest of the animal kingdom is our ability to attract mates in ways others than hooting, hollering and making other loud noises. We have highly evolved strategies like pick up lines, paying for drinks, and buying fancy cars and clothes to impress women.

Apparently no one clued in Miguel Angel Rivera Flores to all of that. He's been taking his pick-up strategies from the zoo, and was arrested for making animal noises to try to attract woman while he was publicly masturbating at a Bonita Spring Beach.


Lee County Deputies had received multiple reports of a man reportedly trying to lure woman and children to him by making animal noises. Once he got their attention he whipped out his animalhood and begin masturbating.

Flores had reportedly even been hiding in bushes and sneaking around outside public beach showers while making the noises.

Deputies finally caught the man when they got a tip that he was hiding behind a foreclosed home in the area.

Flores now faces prowling charges, but could face more legal trouble as according to the Naples Daily News he is an illegal immigrant.

Follow Miami New Times on Facebook and Twitter @MiamiNewTimes.

KEEP NEW TIMES FREE... Since we started New Times, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Miami, and we'd like to keep it that way. Your membership allows us to continue offering readers access to our incisive coverage of local news, food, and culture with no paywalls. You can support us by joining as a member for as little as $1.