Sports

Fifteen Signs You Might Be a #HeatLifer

The time has come to find out who the real Miami Heat fans are. Now that the team has moved on from the Heatles Era, fans will be able to look around at one another and find out who's been down from day one.

The Miami Heat rolled out its #HeatLifer campaign this off-season, and it's exactly what it sounds like -- a roll call of sorts that enables fans to identify themselves as lifelong supporters of the team.

Coach Erik Spoelstra describes a #HeatLifer as someone who is a part of the Miami Heat family through thick and thin. "We're about family, we're about loyalty, we're about all the things you would like a pro sports team to embody," he told the media this week. "But we're the only sports organization that truly lives it."

But what makes someone a #HeatLifer? Glad you asked. You might be a #HeatLifer if:

1. Someone says, "The Pink Elephant," and you know exactly what it means.

2. You consider this song borderline gospel music, and it makes you want to drop to your knees and sing it to the heavens.

3. No matter what he prefers, Dwyane Wade will always be "Flash" to you.

4. People look at you funny during rainstorms because you yell, "Thunndddddderrrrrr!" for no apparent reason.

5. You think it's incredibly weird that teenagers know him only as "DJ Rony Seikaly."

6. You know exactly where you were when you heard that the Heat traded Glen Rice.

7. You believe Julia Dale has magical powers, and you would sign a petition barring anyone else from singing the National Anthem at a Miami Heat playoff game.

8. You would rather not talk about the fact that Tim Hardaway's little boy grew up to play for the New York Knicks.

9. You think this might be the coolest dude on Earth.

10. When you hear the name "Steve Smith," you don't think of an NFL player.

11. You know that the Heat had a Udonis Haslem before they had the Udonis Haslem.

12. It will always be Allan bleeping Houston to you.

13. Heat games wouldn't be the same without "Yeaaaah, baby!" and "Kaboom!"

14. You consider Coach Ron Rothstein the wise grandfather of Heat Nation.

15. You've been there from day one and will be there for the rest of your life.

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Ryan Yousefi is a freelance writer for Miami New Times, a lover of sports, and an expert consumer of craft beer and pho. Hanley Ramirez once stole a baseball from him and to this day still owes him $10.