Bruno the Delicious

You gay porn connoisseurs might know Bruno Diaz from Wet Dreams, Part 2 and the very subtly titled Thick as Thieves. Or perhaps you horndogs recognize him as Coast Guard Officer #1 in 1999's quadruple-X-rated Hot Times in Little Havana. Remember that oldie but goodie? After a tanned and boyish Cuban rafter washes up onshore, Bruno — whose oiled-up muscles look like they're trying to escape from his black uniform — asks, "Where are your papers?"

Then he strips the Cuban naked, slips on some rubber gloves, and conducts a full-cavity search. There's a lot of moaning, a good old-fashioned salad-tossing, and — naturally — some anal lovin'. In the end, he lets the rafter go.

Two thumbs up.

But now, folks at his new gig are less than pleased with his, uh, performance. This past spring, Bruno was hired as manager of the Miami Beach Police Athletic League gym in Flamingo Park. In that job, he sits at a desk and collects payments down the hall from a kids' program.

Recently, he's been the subject of at least four complaint letters to Miami Beach Police Chief Carlos Noriega and PAL board members. Three of them are rather humdrum. He has a "rude attitude," had "arguments," and caused "discomfort." (PAL is a nonprofit organization independent of Miami Beach Police.)

Then there's this one: "Is there a reasonable explanation why Bruno Diaz, gay hard-core porn star, is employed and managing a Police Athletic League gym at Flamingo Park?... It is really disturbing that Bruno and the PAL are in the same building as the after-school program for children in grades K-6. Bruno and the young boys and girls peruse the halls together. Is this appropriate?" It's signed by "A Concerned Miami Beach Resident."


Neither PAL Executive Director Harry "Rocky" Morgan nor Chief Noriega returned calls seeking comment about Bruno. But the retired porn king — who sports a salt-and-pepper goatee to match his glistening biceps — denies causing any confrontations. Sitting behind his tidy desk at the gym recently, he explains some gym members have a vendetta because he runs a tight ship.

"I just think [my past] is so irrelevant," he says, adding that porn stars have gone on to do great things. "I mean, even Paris Hilton has an erotic movie. I could understand if it was children or, like, animals or blood or rape or something. But have you seen it? It's sooo vanilla."

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Natalie O'Neill
Contact: Natalie O'Neill