Birdman Got a Lady's Phone Number Last Night After Raining Points on the Mavs

LeBron James came out of the All-Star break dropping bombs on your moms, assists on your sis, and dunks on your uncs on his way to a season high 42 points in the Heat's 117-106 win over the Mavs. LeBron added nine rebounds and six assists to the 50th 40-plus game of his career. After the game he offered Mark Cuban 100 percent of these balls for 0 percent of his company. Cuban graciously declined. He was out.

Besides LeBron going full LeBron, the story of the game was Birdman putting it in Mark Cuban, then courting the females of Dallas. Birdman went 7-9 from the field on his way to 18 points, the last three of which came on a three point shot that was just too much for Cube's face to take. Then came some magic in the stands.

After Birdman was done embarrassing the Mavs, he was offered a female's phone number, which he accepted. Pimpin' is easy.

LeBron had it going from the start, scoring 13 in a first quarter that, among other things, featured another Wade to LeBron half court oop.

So unoriginal these guys, I mean, it's boring with this already. Why don't you two go write Hangover 4 while you're beating to death old material? Geesh.

The win is the Heat's sixth in a row against Dallas, which makes 2011 piss you off even more. Hate you forever, 2011, haychu so much.

Next up for your Miami basketball Heat is a trip to Oklahoma City to take on Kevin "THE SERVANT" Durant and the Thunder. Ewwwwwwwww, scarrrrrrrry, he's gonna beat you with his terrific and prompt service! Worst nickname ever.

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