Just another Tuesday night down at the Trailerama Trailer Park in Marathon last night, where a crazily bearded fellow named Fidel grabbed a rusty machete and attacked his roommate, who narrowly escaped a gruesome end by hurling cinder blocks at Fidel's head. Life in the Keys!
The trouble went down around 8 p.m. last night when Eduardo Gonzalez, a 45-year-old Trailerama resident, told his roommate -- an unemployed 52-year-old fisherman named Fidel Gutierrez -- that he'd have to move out of the trailer, according to a police report.
Fidel did not take the news well. Gonzalez says Gutierrez "became enraged," ran into the kitchen, grabbed a "wooden handled rusty machete" and began swinging it at him.
Gonzalez "hurled two large cinder blocks at Fidel in defense," Monroe County Sheriff's officers write in the report. But Fidel was able to strike Gonzalez twice in the forearm with the blade before running off.
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Officers later found Gutierrez hiding out in a heavily wooded area, covered in blood. He told police that Gonzalez had actually attacked him with the machete first, yet the only wound on his arm looked to be from a cinder-block blow.
Gonzalez, meanwhile, required "multiple staples" to close the "open flap of skin on his left arm," and an ER nurse reports that the machete attack likely severed his tendons.
Gutierrez faces a felony charge of attempted murder.