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Ultra 2013: Top Ten (Almost) Naked Raver Bros

Gay, straight, bi, or simply rolling face, if you're a man with abs like Jesus and just enough fabric to cover your genitals, there's nothing wrong with sporting a little male camel in Miami this weekend.

It's Ultra Music Festival, baby! And the Gym, Tan, Molly fraternal order of male ravers are loud, proud, and hanging 'round in their Diesel underpants, Umbro soccer shorts, and furry boots.

Here are the top ten (almost) naked raver bros at Ultra 2013.

See also:

-Ten Raver Tips on How to Dress for Ultra 2013

-Ultra 2013: Yeasayer Insulted the Ravers While Matt & Kim Charmed Them

-Ultra Music Festival 2013, Weekend One, Day Two: The 91-Photo Slideshow

-Top Ten at Ultra 2013, Day Two: Deadmau5, Molly, and Nobody F#$%ed a Tree

-The Six Bad Bitches You Meet at Ultra Music Festival

-Ultra in Pics: The 15 Photo Highlights, From Marijuana Boobs to Human Bananas

Ho! Ho! Ho!

Y'all have heard of Santa Claus, right? This is his raving doppelgänger, Santa Cock.


The Village People called; they need the headdress back, papo.

A Formal Affair

Ultra Dress Policy: Black tie, no shirt.


This bro's spirit animal must be exhibitionist panda. Cute boots, dude.

Full Chub

Is that a banana in your pants? Or are you just happy to be at Ultra? Well played, Chubs.


Ballsy outfit, bro!

Fanny Package

We actually asked this bro to "act natural" for the picture.


With that much body hair, why bother wearing clothes?

Captain No Pants

Who needs pants when you've got a captain's hat, sunglasses, and sweet golf cart?

Ultra Formal

Always remember to match your tie to your kandi kid accessories.

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