In the immortal words of hip-pop visionaries Loving My Friends and Others, more commonly known as LMFAO: "We're in Miami, bitch."
In fact, we here at Crossfade are drink-all-day, play-all-night, party-rocking freaks who spend every Thursday-through-Sunday getting wasted in the megaclubs, wearing Vans, and stumbling in the sand with a Red Bull and vodka in our hands.
But it's impossible to spend a full four days getting' it poppin' in the exact same place. 'Cause eventually the bartender's gonna cut off the VIP bottles. So just bounce around beach, avoid getting kicked out the club, and stay forever faded with our guide to this weekend's six best SoBe parties.
Dada Life Presents Dada Land. With Mednas. Thursday, November 1, 11 p.m., LIV, 4441 Collins Ave., Miami Beach; 305-674-4680; livnightclub.com. Tickets cost $40 to $50 plus fees via wantickets.com. Ages 21 and up. Ever taken a trip to Dada Land? Well, it's the beat-freaking kingdom overseen by Swedish electro-house duo Olle Corneer and Stefan Engblom, where there are "no rules but the rules of Dada." And, uh, "proper dress attire required."
Steve Bug's Noir Album Tour. With Danyelino and Hardline. Presented by LINK and Miami Rebels. Friday, November 2, 10 p.m., Treehouse, 323 23rd St., Miami Beach; 305-614-4478; treehousemiami.com. Tickets cost $10 to $15 plus fees via residentadvisor.net. Ages 21 and up. Unfortunately, Steve Bug isn't some kinda half-man, half-insect who goes uhntz-uhntz behind the decks. He's just a living legend of EDM who's only founded, like, three labels -- Raw Elements, Dessous, Poker Flat -- and released six measly slabs of classic ass-jacking house. Pfft ... Whatever.
Sky Blu. With Mednas. Friday, November 1, 11 p.m., LIV, 4441 Collins Ave., Miami Beach; 305-674-4680; livnightclub.com. Tickets cost $40 to $60 plus fees via wantickets.com. Ages 21 and up. Who came to party?! Duh, it's Sky Blu (AKA Skyler Husten Gordy), the grandson of Motown mastermind Berry Gordy and the other half of LMFAO. He's half black! He's half white! The human dice! And just 'cause he and homeboy Redfoo are taking a hiatus from making multi-platinum records together, it don't mean the party rocking's gonna stop.
Sebastien Drums. With Chicco Secci. Saturday, November 3, 10 p.m., Wall at the W Hotel, 2201 Collins Ave., Miami Beach; 305-938-3131; wallmiami.com. Tickets cost $60 plus fees via wantickets.com. Ages 21 and up. How should we measure the mettle of a dance music dude? His famous friends. And French house producer Sebastien Drums is BFFs with ultra-mega-superstar jocks like Avicii, Swedish House Mafia, David Guetta, and Tiësto. As Seb himself says: "[I am] a member of the international DJ premier league."
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Style of Eye. With Laurent Simeca. Saturday, November 3, 11 p.m., Mansion, 1235 Washington Ave., Miami Beach; 305-695-8411; mansionmiami.com. Tickets cost $30 plus fees via wantickets.com. Ages 21 and up. Straight outta Stockholm, Style of Eye (born Linus Eklöw) is a man of many influences. Indeed, according to his official bio, Mr. Eye's sound owes as much to artists "like Stevie Wonder or 19th century classical composer Edvard Grieg ... as acts like Yelllo or Krafwerk." Translation: Bro makes symphonic soul-funk robot rock that'll make a roomful of ecstatic club junkies shake that ass.
Prok + Fitch. With Louis Dee. Sunday, November 4, 11 p.m., SET, 320 Lincoln Rd., Miami Beach; 305-531-2800; setmiami.com. Tickets cost $30 plus fees via wantickets.com. Ages 21 and up. When they're not dining on börek in Slovenia or licking to the center of the Lollipop Club in Albania, Prok + Fitch subsist on a diet of "house, grooves, and Sambuca." But this Sunday, this pair of world-travelling party pros will be in Miami, bitch. And they'll be living off party rock and Red Bull vodkas for four full days. Just like the rest of us SoBe freaks.