Tequila, Mick Fleetwood from Fleetwood Mac, and Brooklyn coffeehouse singer-songwriter Nicole Atkins ... It sounds like the beginning of a joke.
But no, it's the basis for the inaugural Cabo Wabo Tequila Off The Record webseries, where "up-and-coming" music artists pair with wash-ups to shill hooch.
In this dark, weird new age of viral marketing, nothing makes sense. But something is always for sale. Check the jump for an extremely detailed breakdown of a magical five minutes with Mick Fleetwood that only fermented agave could engender.
0:01
Just seems like a little viral marketing at first. But as the interview progresses, you'll soon realize tequila is not only this magic moment's sponsor: it's the only way anyone could convince Mick to sit down with what's-her-name.
00:12
Actually, from the scalding lechery in his eyes, it seems like what's-her-name earned the Mick Fleetwood stamp of approval the second he realized she had ta-tas.
0:39
OK, I guess we can stop being dicks and address our hostess by her name: Nicole Atkins. Can someone Ask Jeeves, "Who the hell is Nicole Atkins and why is she so googly-eyed?"
00:57
Mick imparts some ol' timey wisdom: If you're hanging out with the Grateful Dead, you "don't not" take acid.
1:40
"When I was your age, we had to walk 15 miles in a hailstorm to a dried-up well, which we then had to throw ourselves down because there was no ladder, not even a bucket. And then, once at the bottom, we had to stand on each other's shoulders and pass our equipment upward. When I was your age..."
1:57
The "biggest record ever" line -- coy sideways glance and all -- is the kind of egomania we've come to respect from Mac-related media. Thanks for keeping shit consistent, Fleetwood.
2:46
"What got us through it was the music." And by music, he means drugs.
2:55
Atkins begins to talk about her own new album. Quicksand fills our nostrils, mouths, esophagus, throat, stomach, and soon floods our bowels.
3:21
In the clip's "realest" moment, Mick Fleetwood seductively strums a mandolin while Nicole Atkins checks Facebook on her smart phone.
3:52
Look, let's be honest, the only reason any of us are here is BOOZE.
4:08
This video is actually the start of a new intervention TV show where aging rock stars help rock star simulacrums realize that they've never actually listened to music.
4:16
We could have told you Nicole Atkins has a song called "Brooklyn's on Fire" from the first look at her.
5:12
Oh, yeah, sure, we'll watch this hair-in-the-face Nicole Atkins diddy. P.S. This doesn't sound like Edith Piaf or Stevie Nicks. WTF MICK?!?
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