ADHD? Downs? Three nipples? Slurred speech?
According to TMZ, Yeezy's pregnant "perfect bitch," Kim Kardashian, is mad stressed about her and estranged husband Humphries's sluggish divorce proceedings. And during a recent house call, her personal doctor suggested that the child might develop "long-term effects" if the Kourtney & Kim Take Miami reality star doesn't get her shit under control.
Humphries's lawyer, however, smells bullshit.
"What are [Kardashian's attorneys] hiding?" attorney Marshall Waller states in new court documents filed, according to E! News. "What is there in the raw footage of this televised courtship, 72-day marriage, and resultant breakup that they are so afraid of us discovering?"
Waller adds, "What is really going on here is that an 'urgency' in the form of an apparently unplanned pregnancy, something the Respondent had nothing to do with, is perceived by Plaintiff as an opportunity to gain a litigation advantage by trying to force this court to prematurely set this matter for trial."
To backtrack, Kardashian and Humphries were married August 20, 2011, but the former filed for divorce 72 days later, on Halloween. Humphries responded by filing a petition to annul the marriage under the grounds that'd he'd been punked and made to look like a fool on national television.
Adding insult to injury, Kayne West proved he's a better rebounder than Humphries when the superstar rapper shacked up with Kim, subsequently crowning her his "perfect bitch" before impregnating her with his arrogant seed. Homie even dissed Humphries on a track because, well, he's a bit a dick.
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"And I'll admit, I fell in love with Kim / 'Round the same time she had fell in love wit' him / Well, that's cool, baby girl, do ya thing / Lucky I ain't have Jay drop 'im from the team."
Let's just keep our fingers crossed that Baby West-Kardashian's exploitation subsides when its finally out of Mama Kardashian's womb.