Critic's Notebook

Justin Bieber Blames Paparazzo’s Death on Lack of “Meaningful Legislation”

Society's inexplicable obsession with Justin Bieber cost a man his life in Los Angeles. And the Biebz says a lack of "meaningful legislation" is to blame. According to CNN, a paparazzo, whose name has not been released, was struck by oncoming traffic as he attempted to walk across Interstate 405...
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Society’s inexplicable obsession with Justin Bieber cost a man his life in Los Angeles. And the Biebz says a lack of “meaningful legislation” is to blame.

According to CNN, a paparazzo, whose name has not been released, was struck by oncoming traffic as he attempted to walk across Interstate 405 following a routine traffic stop involving Bieber’s white Ferrari, but not Bieber himself.

The photographer later died at a nearby hospital.

“While I was not present nor directly involved with this tragic accident,” Bieber said in a statement, “my thoughts and prayers are with the family of the victim.”

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“Hopefully this tragedy will finally inspire meaningful legislation and whatever other necessary steps to protect the lives and safety of celebrities, police officers, innocent public bystanders, and the photographers themselves.”

In a society where celebrity gossip is big business and Snooki gossip is considered a top story on Google News, legislation is the last thing that’ll prevent future tragedies like this one from occurring again.

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But Bieber’s head is so far up his own ass that the “Boyfriend” singer actually thinks a few laws could’ve prevented yesterday’s horrific incident.

Not so, “Baby.”

The best way to prevent pointlessly tragic accidents is through a societal shift in consciousness.

Sure, pop culture is vital. We often need an escape from the “real world,” and mindless reality television, big-budget action flicks, and bubblegum pop music are always there for us when we need a break. But we’ve gone overboard.

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What if Bieber had been in the car yesterday, and the photographer did snap a picture of him picking his nose or smoking a cigarette or simply sitting, would the shot have then been worth life and limb?

Who knows? It’s not like we can’t ask the photographer. He’s dead.

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