José El Rey

It's nearly impossible to try to explain José El Rey to anybody who did not live in South Florida in the late Eighties or early Nineties — you either get it or you don't. Those who get it, however, are in for a delicious treat. Writing about the King and his sexy exploits is a difficult thing, kinda like stumbling over words to describe the same sexual act in 1,000 unique ways. But let's bite into the meat of this 10-track shorty with the thick thighs.

"Bow Down to and Party with the King" kicks off with the whole Miami Bass Warriors Crew getting its party on before the beats and low-end bass frequencies rock into the Casio-tone advice column that is "Safety First." Crowd favorite "Offended? By My Sex" rounds out the opening trio before the real aggro cleanup bat of "Cójelo, con Take It Easy, Baby" and the duo with Afrobeta's Cusi Amador "2-gether 4-ever." The production throughout the album is clean enough for your speakers to handle, but the bass still thumps hard. El Rey did a good job trusting Otto Von Schirach with some recording elements here, and the payoff is so sweet I actually mean the following statement in the fullest complimentary accolade I can muster: This should be played in every roller rink across the galaxy (Hot Wheels anyone?).

Closing out with some slightly retooled oldies — "Chame on U," "Night Time Ladies of the Night," and "We Are the Players" — this blue-blooded platter is the hottest thing to grace your house in a long time. Don't ever say your Rey didn't care, because he does. He can't fall in love, but he can sure make it.

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Abel Folgar