Eight Best Club Parties on South Beach This Weekend

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Bro, what a mission!

We just moved into a new place outside the city limits y los vesinos are already starting to piss us off. They've got three huge dogs, one of which insists on barking super early in the morning while the other two stare us down through a crack in the wooden fence.

We're like the kids in Sandlot, every homerun we hit into the neighbors yard becomes those beasts' new chew toy. No doubt, we need a drink. In fact, we need to pop bottles. And what better place to forget about shoddy neighbors than a South Beach nightclub?

Check out this weekend's best club parties on South Beach.

Italian Job Presents Ben DJ & Friends. Thursday, March 15, 11 p.m., WALL at the W Hotel, 2201 Collins Ave., Miami Beach. Italian club banger Ben DJ's bringing his friends to the W and all you need is $60 to party with them.

LIV Presents Nicky Romero. Thursday, March 15, 11 p.m., LIV, 4441 Collins Ave., Miami Beach. Dutch master DJ and David Guetta labelmate Nicky Romero's in town and he's ready to rip the dance floor's tits.

Spring Break with DJ Pauly D. Friday, March 16, 11 p.m., Mansion, 1235 Washington Ave., Miami Beach. Party like a Jersey Shore hoodrat with Pauly D and his fist-pumping diehards.

Magic Circus Presents Mord Fustang. Friday, March 16, 11 p.m., Amnesia, 136 Collins Ave., Miami Beach. Electro-house dubstepper Mord Fustang crashes into Amnesia for a night you'll never forget.

Nervous Records Presents Oscar G: Made in Miami. Friday, March 16, 12 p.m., The Pool at the Shelborne, 1801 Collins Ave., Miami Beach. Miami's favorite son of the uhntz-uhntz-uhntz invites y'all to get wet.

Electric Beach. Saturday, March 17, 12 p.m., Nikki Beach, One Ocean Dr., Miami Beach. Drop $35 and get a shit-ton of EDM music. Yeah, March has arrived en la playa.

Saturdays with The 400 Hosted French Montana. Saturday, March 17, 11 p.m., Cameo, 1445 Washington Ave., Miami Beach. MMG dude French Montana hosts Saturday's hottest hip-hop party.

Casa Ibiza. Sunday, March 18, noon, Congress Hotel, 1052 Ocean Dr., Miami Beach. The Spaniards are coming! The Spaniards are coming! Welcome home, Ibiza.

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