Usually when C. Breezy visits a morning talk show for a lil' chit-chat about domestic violence, all the windows get smashed.
This morning, though, an uncharacteristically sedate Chris Brown visited with NBC's Matt Lauer on the set of the Today Show to discuss a new single, "the Quincy Jones approach," that infamous 2009 felony conviction for beating up Rihanna, his current perspective on punching ladies, and being a "changed man."
"I think it's just me proving myself once again," Breezy insists. "And also, just me being a man, knowing that what I did was wrong and never doing it again."
But being a hard-nosed a.m. newsman, Lauer didn't just let Breezy peddle a PR-approved line of touchy-feely bullshit.
The Today host put the pincers to Chris, pointing out that "there are cynics out there and skeptics out there who are gonna say, 'Well, he's a changed man because he's out there selling a new album.'"
Lauer also cited Brown's bar brawl with Drake, parking-lot punch up with Frank Ocean, and Instagrams that "weren't the most wholesome pictures" as proof that the 23-year-old R&B douche is probably still as big of a shithead as ever.
For Breezy, though, it (i.e., not punching ladies) is all about emotional education.
"It's just a learning process... And as far as me and [Rihanna] are concerned, she knows my heart, and I know her heart.
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"I did my 52 weeks of counseling and learned that [hitting her] was absolutely wrong."
But then Lauer asks, "And you're sure it will never happen again?"
And Breezy's reply: A head shake, an "absolutely," and a strange, less-than-convincing cackle.