It might seem like a really rad idea to spend the next four days scorning sleep, sucking down free shots, and shuttling at top speed between endless arty parties, secret shows, and secretly arty lap dances. But if you don't put together a real plan and, uh, fucking pace yourself, all y'all just might get bashed by Basel.
Thus, in an effort to prevent Miami's art addicts, club rats, and scene kids from succumbing to fatally arty exhaustion, we here at Crossfade have selected Art Basel Miami Beach week's ten best parties, concerts, and strip shows.
Nightdrive and Stüssy's Art Basel Kickoff. With Geneva Jacuzzi, Pollyn, Selebrities, and others. Thursday, December 1, 11 p.m., Mamushka's Midtown, 31 NW 36th St., Miami; 786-991-3823. No cover. Ages 21 and up. Start your art adventure with Nightdrive, Stüssy, and a bunch of rad bands. Get drunk. Have fun. Ruin your best streetwear.
Neon Indian. With MillionYoung and Contra. Thursday, December 1, 10 p.m., Bardot, 3456 N. Miami Ave., Miami; 305-576-7750; bardotmiami.com. Tickets cost $30 to $42 at the door. Ages 21 and up. Nope, Neon Indian is not a Bollywood superhero. He's a chillwave pioneer. Surf that cresting squall of sonic bliss straight into Basel week. Read Crossfade's full blog about Neon Indian at Bardot.
Cashmere Kitties Music Festival. With Pocket of Lollipops, Mr. Feathers, Metro Zu, and others. Thursday, December 1, to Saturday, December 3, 6:30 p.m., The Kohn Compound, 219 NW 24th St., Miami. No cover. All ages. No doubt, Basel can get pretty sketchy. So if you're seeking a safehouse, hit the Kohn Compound for Cashmere Kitties' three-day music fest.
Twin Shadow. As part of Absolut Vodka Cocktails Perfected. Friday, December 2, 8 p.m., NE 27th St. and NE Second Ave., Miami. No cover. Let shit get trippy with synth magician Twin Shadow, a half-bottle of Absolut, and maybe a hit of something harsher.
F**k Me I'm Famous! by Cathy and David Guetta. Friday, December 2, 11 p.m., LIV, 4441 Collins Ave., Miami; 305-674-4680; livnightclub.com. Tickets cost $200 via wantickets.com. Ages 21 and over. Ostensibly, Basel week is all about the art. But if we wanna be real, it's about stalking famous people. And then fucking 'em.
Resale Concert Tickets
Steve Martin and Martin Short
Saturday, Jan. 25, 2020 / 8:00pm @ Hard Rock Live At The Seminole Hard Rock Hotel
Fab 5 Freddy and Ninjasonik. As part of Fountain Art Fair's opening night, presented by Artlog. Friday, December 2, 7 p.m., Fountain Art Fair Miami, 2505 N. Miami Ave., Miami; fountainexhibit.com. One-day tickets cost $10 and weekend passes cost $15 at the door. Dude, a three-hour sesh with old-schooler Fab 5 Freddy and new-schoolers Ninjasonik is basically a warp-speed trip through the history of hip-hop.
Basel Castle 2011. Presented by The Overthrow with Yelawolf, a DJ set by The Rapture, Penguin Prison, and others. Saturday, December 3, 5 p.m., Overthrow Castle, 41 NW 20th St., Miami; baselcastle.theoverthrow.com. Free before 9 p.m. with RSVP or $10 at the door. Ages 18 and up. On Saturday night at approximately 11:59 p.m., your four-day arty party orgy will hit its skull-splitting climax. In a freaking castle. Read Crossfade's full blog about Basel Castle.
Tom Tom Magazine's Art Basel Showcase. With Holly Hunt, Snakehole, The State Of, and others. Saturday, December 3, 8 p.m., Churchill's Pub, 5501 NE Second Ave., Miami; 305-757-1807; churchillspub.com. Tickets cost $7 at the door. We here at Crossfade have been quoted as saying, "It's a proven fact that the hottest thing in rock 'n' roll is a woman on drums." So don't miss this Basel bash thrown by a magazine dedicated entirely to ladies who slap the skins for a living. Read Crossfade's full blog about Tom Tom Mag's showcase.
Crosstown Rebels present Get Lost Art Basel. With Damian Lazarus, Clive Henry, Lee Curtiss, and others. Sunday, December 4, noon, Electric Pickle, 2826 N. Miami Ave., Miami; 305-456-5613; electricpicklemiami.com. Tickets cost $35 plus fees via residentadvisor.net. Age 21 and up. Why wait for WMC or Miami Music Week? Unleash your Basel beat freak at Crosstown Rebels' Get Lost. Read Crossfade's full blog about Get Lost Art Basel at the Pickle.
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Hard 2 Leave. Presented by The Overthrow with Craze, Tamara Sky, Ninjasonik, Caligula, Troy Kurtz, and others. Sunday, December 4, 11 p.m., Goldrush Miami, 29 NE 11 St., Miami; theoverthrow.com. Tickets cost $10 plus fees via eventbrite.com. Ages 21 and up. Absolutely every week in Miami ends with a trip to the strip club. Hence, Hard 2 Leave. Be sure your personal Basel kit includes plenty of sweaty, crumpled dolla, dolla bills, y'all. Read Crossfade's full blog about the Hard 2 Leave strip club party.