New Year's Eve

Amanda Lepore, Justin Bond, and Cazwell for New Queer's Eve at Lords South Beach

In a recent episode of NBC's 30 Rock, Jenna was sad 'cause she was going to miss out on going to Elton John and Tom Ford's New Queer's Eve. She had broken up with her cross-dressing boyfriend Paul, just as they were planning to go together as a couple in costume.

In the end, the odd pair makes up and decides to dress as "two black swans": Paul getting all decked out as Natalie Portman in the movie Black Swan and Jenna as former Pittsburgh Steelers wide receiver and Pennsylvania gubernatorial nominee Lynn Swann.

Even through 30 Rock's absurd humor -- and past references to Gay Halloween being better than regular Halloween -- we know what they are trying to say: The gays are better at everything. When they aren't busying gentrifying neighborhoods or sprucing up straight men, they are throwing bitchin' parties.

And Miami's homo contingent won't be left out of celebrating New Year's Eve properly. Example: South Beach's only gay boutique hotel, Lords, is hosting its House of Lords New Year's Eve bash. The lineup features fashion icon/muse/singer/model Amanda Lepore, singer/songwriter Justin Bond, and hip-hop MC Cazwell.

The event is pretty affordable for a South Beach NYE party. General admission will only set you back $40, while $100 will earn you VIP status. So would you rather spend $450 to be at some regular NYE thing with Tiësto? Or save several hundred bucks and take 30 Rock's advice?

House of Lords with Amanda Lepore, Justin Bond, and Cazwell. Lords South Beach, 1120 Collins Ave., Miami Beach. Doors at 9:30 p.m., and tickets cost $40 to $100 via Ages 21 and up. Call 305-674-7800 or visit

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Jose D. Duran is the associate editor of Miami New Times. He's the strategist behind the publication's eyebrow-raising Facebook and Twitter feeds. He has also been reporting on Miami's cultural scene since 2006. He has a BS in journalism and will live in Miami as long as climate change permits.
Contact: Jose D. Duran