When middle-aged lovers in matching pastel jumpsuits finally pop that little blue pill, light a dozen vanilla-scented candles, and get ready to rock so very soft, there's only one soundtrack sexy enough for that kind of action -- the sweet and flaccid strains of Air Supply's Forever Love: Greatest Hits.
Packed with 36 tracks worth of adult-contempo muzak, this particular collection focuses almost exclusively on the Australian duo's early- to mid-'80s string of gloriously airbrushed smash singles, including "Lost in Love," "All Out of Love," and "Here I Am (Just When I Thought I Was Over You)."
And basically, it's gonna be the same deal when Air Supply breezes into Magic City Casino this Saturday. Expect a rose-colored, soft-focus live rerun of the band's increasingly distant glory days: Guitarist Graham Russell's weepy guitar wanking will commingle with singer Russell Hitchcock's crisp castrato wailing for approximately one hour before climaxing with an encore of 1983's rock opera ode to whispering, crying, and lying, "Making Love Out of Nothing at All."
Man, we can already hear those lyrics -- "And I know just where to touch you... And I know when to let you loose" -- not to mention, um, the careful, quiet sounds of the color-coordinated crowd's slo-mo sexing.
Air Supply with Christopher Cross. Saturday, January 22. Magic City Casino, 450 NW 37th Ave., Miami. The show starts at 8 p.m. and tickets cost $15 to $75. Call 305-649-3000 or visit magiccitycasino.com.
Keep Miami New Times Free... Since we started Miami New Times, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Miami, and we would like to keep it that way. Offering our readers free access to incisive coverage of local news, food and culture. Producing stories on everything from political scandals to the hottest new bands, with gutsy reporting, stylish writing, and staffers who've won everything from the Society of Professional Journalists' Sigma Delta Chi feature-writing award to the Casey Medal for Meritorious Journalism. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering Miami with no paywalls.