Welcome to the southernmost tip of the Floridian peninsula, otherwise known as the land of Purple Christmas.
Now if you've never celebrated the high holidays in Miami, here's the deal: We don't decorate trees. We cut 'em down and smoke 'em.
And this year, the fine folks at local nightlife company WRLD are spreading the joy of the stoned season by hosting a full night of festivities at Grand Central.
Swag rapper and professional pothead A$AP Rocky (AKA Rakim Mayers) will be serving as the master of ceremonies. He'll be sparkin' spliffs, spittin' riffs, and smokin' out the joint alongside fellow weed fans Lunden and Gabe Fields. Seasonal sounds will be ringing loud and it's gonna smell like Christmas, i.e. ripe, deeply kush, and somewhat piney.
Try sharing your hash stash and Rocky might even teach you all about the trichromatic traditions of Purp X-Mas, including how to properly pick out a purple tree, the appropriate time to harvest those resin-coated buds, and the right method for rolling a big, fat yule blunt -- plus tips on achieving that perfect holiday head high.
'Tis the season to be tokin'. And just like A$AP Rocky says, "Everything is purple."
A$AP Rocky's Purple Christmas. With Lunden and special guest Gabe Fields. Thursday, December 29. Grand Central, 697 N. Miami Ave., Miami. The show starts at 10 p.m. and tickets cost $15 to $30 via ticketweb.com. Ages 18 and up. Call 305-377-2277 or visit grandcentralmiami.com.
Keep Miami New Times Free... Since we started Miami New Times, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Miami, and we would like to keep it that way. Offering our readers free access to incisive coverage of local news, food and culture. Producing stories on everything from political scandals to the hottest new bands, with gutsy reporting, stylish writing, and staffers who've won everything from the Society of Professional Journalists' Sigma Delta Chi feature-writing award to the Casey Medal for Meritorious Journalism. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering Miami with no paywalls.