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At Exxxotica in Miami Beach, which ended Sunday, girls swayed on giant wooden swing-sets hanging from the ceiling and moved slowly around strategically placed poles. Endless shelves were filled with sex toys, and simulated acts occurred around you at any given time.
It seems total attention was given to boobs and leather chaps by the event’s directors, because the food was sub-par. Then again, you weren’t there for the penis ice pops or fried onion rings.
Luckily, the starlets signing autographs for dumbstruck workin’ stiffs, happen to get their Miami food elsewhere. And some of them were gracious enough to put down the pens, and let us know where they dine and what they order when they are here.
Capri Anderson
I know they say save the best for last, but this girl was by far the most friendly and normal out of all of them. When I asked her what her favorite restaurant in Miami was, she nearly threw down her pen in excitement and proclaimed, “Well, hello, David’s Cafe, of course! I’m a Miami girl, born and raised, and every time I’m in town, I have to get their empanadas and croquettes.” Capri, if you’re reading this, let’s go!
Alexis Texas
I figured based off of her name, she might have said a Southern restaurant, but I guess that’s why they say you shouldn’t judge a book by it’s cover. A few moments after her eyes’ gaze met mine, she told me her restaurant of choice was Sushi Samba Dromo on Lincoln Road. Oh, and her favorite rolls are the dragon and avocado.
Madison Fox
I met Madison once about two years ago in Las Vegas through some mutual friends. I though she’d be in attendance, but I had no idea she’d be the first girl you see when you walk inside. When I asked her the golden question, she pondered for a moment. I couldn’t tell if she was scanning my face for recognition of that night, or if she was thinking about restaurants. After a momentary pause, she peeped out “Kung Fu Kitchen, love their dumplings.”
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