Nobody bothered to tell me that April was National Poetry Month — no doubt a conspiracy started by someone who has read my poems. Here goes:3 Cuts of PorkI.I don’t think I’ll ever seeA poem as lovely as pork bun with kimchiII.Lobster with peanut butter and jellyA big fat square…
Let’s say the Democratic Party is a corned beef sandwich, and the Republican Party is a pastrami sandwich (if you’re a Democrat who prefers pastrami, or a Republican who prefers corned beef, feel free to switch around the meat metaphor). And let’s say both are very tasty sandwiches, but there…
At this point, we are all aware that eating organic produce, meats, and dairy products are better for us. Whether you choose to pay the extra money for these goods is another story. If you live an organic lifestyle, you might be surprised to learn that several so-called eco-groceries are…
Guess who was spotted partying last night at Electric Pickle? Snooki and JWoww! Guess since South Beach is being less the hospitable, the Jersey Shore gang crossed over to the mainland. Here are some grainy iPhone pictures snapped by Tom De Bens.This marks the second time this month a reality…
NFL greats Terrell Owens, Lawrence Taylor, Channing Crowder, Ray Buchanan and Matthew Hatchette will show up on a commercial for linebacker Crowder arrived mid-morning and based Sunday Sports Wrap on Channel 7, Channel 4 and Channel 6 will also be airing the commercials along with Sun Sports and FSN, Spike TV…
Short Order has noticed more and more kale popping up on menus all over Miami. We are wondering why this slightly bitter vegetable, in the cabbage family, is suddenly so popular. Is kale the next big food trend?…
In the midst of launching one of the most notorious sandwiches in fast food history, the Double Down, KFC is balancing all of that fried chicken, cheese and bacon with a good cause. From now until May 23, KFC is launching Buckets For The Cure. This program, in conjunction with…
So we stumble across this image, courtesy of World Red Eye, of Mansion’s current marquee declaring “PER NIK RICHIE & THEDIRTY.COM NO JERSEY SHORE ALLOWED AT MANSION MIAMI.” Nik Richie and TheDirty.com is, according to the website, “the world’s first reality blogger” — whatever that fucking means. Richie writes on…
During a recent visit to Whole Foods, Short Order discovered Bubbies Mochi Ice Cream. We purchased a package despite the slightly expensive $7.99 price tag for a package of eight. Bubbies is produced by a Hawaii-based company and comes in 19 different flavors including lychee, strawberry, green tea, azuki bean…
Short Order was shopping at the newest Publix on Miami Beach and was shocked to see the Arctic scene taking place in the ice cream section. Since this location debuted a few months ago, it has been our go-to Publix in the 33139 hood. We have been impressed by the…
The New York Times recently wrote an article about the rising trend of food enthusiasts who photograph their meals and post them online. I have to admit that I have become one of those people. At first, it started innocuously. I would take a picture of a particularly gorgeous dish,…
The backlash against products with high fructose corn syrup has become more vociferous each year as food crusaders like Michael Pollan decry the artificial sweetener. While Coca-Cola stopped using sugar in place of high fructose corn syrup since the mid-’80s, there is a loophole that many soft drink purists hail…
We are sort of stretching this since Winter Music Conference wrapped up Sunday, but it just took a while to finally sit down and process everything we did over the course of last week. But here it is, our final call on all the great and not-so-great things that we…
Cutesy cupcakes are as outdated as truffle oil. All over the country, these ubiquitous mini-cakes are being supplanted in popularity by the donut. Yes, the humble donut is receiving a gourmet makeover from pastry chefs with eclectic flavors and toppings. Even Williams-Sonoma has joined the bandwagon with a donut-shaped cake…
Though Short Order will never complain about getting free food at the beginning of a meal, we do wonder if too many complimentary starters can spoil the rest of the repast. At Italian mainstay Il Gabbiano, for example, all diners upon sitting down are presented with a dizzying array of antipasti.No sooner…
Alarmed by the news that Benihana might be sold, last night Short Order paid a visit to the teppanyaki temple, which is located off the 79th Street Causeway. However, it was business as usual at the waterfront eatery (which, like most Miami restaurants, doesn’t actually have outdoor seating) and none…
All I listen to is country music. I drive a truck with a shotgun rack and a confederate flag and I don’t believe in ipods and I drink and drive cause it’s fun, but I think all those grass smoking, cocaine snorting, ecstasy headed hippies need to take a shower,…
The website Where the Locals Eat wants people to pick “America’s favorite food” through an online game that pitches 64 dishes like burgers, sushi, pizza and nachos head-to-head against each other in brackets. You know, like they do for the NCAA basketball tournament except there’s no real playing of any…
Four food-related movies — two of which you’ve probably never heard of — are up for an Academy Award on Sunday in various categories.Meryl Streep’s performance in Julie & Julia, the movie based on Julia Child’s book My Life in France and Julie Powell’s novel Julie & Julia, is nominated…
I’ll admit I hadn’t heard of Broward MC Lyrikill until I read this post on Miami New Times’ news blog, Riptide 2.0, yesterday. He might now be my favorite 954 rapper. Um, not really — but I did spend a good long while checking out his web presence and laughing…
…It’s alive and well with “Mini Daddy” a.k.a. Adriansito, and his highly inappropriate mini video vixens. Even if Adrian isn’t technically so “-ito,” you’ve gotta love his utter belief that he is, after all, “el nino mas bonito, el nino mas chiquito” — you’re right, that claim doesn’t make sense…
The long answer:An acquaintance of mine recently raved about a Mediterranean-style octopus dish she had at Talula. It was called “cork-braised” octopus, so her natural question to me, Mr. Restaurant Reviewer, was what effect the cork had. I answered confidently and forthrightly, as reviewers are supposed to do. “I don’t…
