Jonathan Henry Cobb, the One Who Didn’t Get Away

Last Friday, I told you about a wild police chase on NE Second Avenue. Well, here’s a mug of the culprit who thought he was reprising Wesley Snipes’s role in U.S. Marshals. His name is Jonathan Henry Cobb, a 25-year-old Brownsville resident who booked it when a blue-and-white attempted to…

Miami Art Musuem Puts Monthly Cocktail Party on Hold

Apparently, tidings of booze and gourmet appetizers were not enough to sway young Miamians to support the Miami Art Museum, the local arts institution that desperately needs to raise private funds for its new home.Taxpayers approved the use of $175 million in county funds to build the $275 million project…

Burger King Lays a Whopper on Washington

The burger blitz continues, but now with a new, ugly twist: A 24-hour Whopper Bar is slated to open on Washington Avenue in South Beach next month. Differences between this and the run-of-the-mill BK: a darker, sleeker décor; delivery by scooter; and longer hours. Bigger difference: “gourmet” burgers such as…

Goodbye, Dan Paul! You Made This Town

So Dan Paul was a little crazy. And the stories of his personal escapades — sexual and otherwise — were legendary in this town.But Paul made modern Miami by writing the county charter in 1957. He was an eccentric genius who, despite earning scads of money, had a wisecrack for…

Martorano and 660 Expand, Chowhound Splits, Nobu Goes on the Road

Bet on This Being a WinnerSteve Martorano, of the famous Café Martorano on Oakland Park Boulevard, brings his brash Italian fare to the Seminole Hard Rock Hotel & Casino this February with the opening of Martorano’s — a 7,400-square-foot restaurant with indoor and outdoor seating for approximately 300. Look for…

Wake Up, Miami Beach Commissioners! You’re All About Volleyball

Roxana Morales leaps to return a spiked volleyball on the dirty sand court near the ancient band shell on Collins Avenue at 73rd Street. A generator that sputters in the background powers dim lights, so she can barely see. She misses.Even this jury-rigged system won’t last long. The generator is…

Second Avenue is Still Hot

I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again. You can always expect a little urban drama near and around 29th Street between NE Second Avenue and Biscayne Boulevard to liven up your work day. Earlier this afternoon a black male suspect in a stolen four-door Hyundai with Arkansas plates led…

Score One for the Enviro-Boys: Lake Belt Plan Shot Down Again

A federal appeals court Thursday shot down a case that greatly endangered both Miami-Dade’s drinking water and Everglades National Park. The three-judge panel confirmed last year’s decision to side with the Sierra Club and several other groups against the Army Corps of Engineers. In 2002, the Corps issued a ten-year permit…

Garage Tapes: Dan Black Meets Dirty Hairy

Normally, I prefer to spend my time and money in clubs that look, feel, and smell like actual garages. But this past Wednesday, I chose instead to spend my time and money in the sex dens of that 21st century disco Sodom, otherwise known as LIV. The night was long,…

FFF: Leftovers

These are some of the funnies I’ve compiled for this column over the past year, but either they didn’t fit in thematically or I just wasn’t that crazy about them. Either way, gotta clear out the cupboard.How complicated can ice cream flavors be? How much can you put in there?…

Top Five Uncle Luke Videos

We don’t advocate theft, but when our little buddy stole a II Live Crew tape from the Spec’s by what’s now Sunset Place sometime in the ’90s it changed our life. Luke taught our eight year old self to cuss out politicians (“Fuck Martinez, Fuck Fuck Martinez”), and told us…

Theater! On South Beach!

This Friday and Saturday night at 9 p.m., you can get a last taste of the cabaret at SoBeArts/The Little Theater on South Beach. It was held over because it was so damn popular. The show, next door to the old Carl Fisher clubhouse just north of the convention center,…

Letters from the issue of January 21, 2009

Panic Peddling Bad spin: Your main thesis that gay people are leaving Miami Beach “in droves” and heading to Fort Lauderdale is absurd. (“Escape From South Beach,” Natalie O’Neill, January 14.) I don’t know what you intended with your sensationalist headline and poorly spun story, but I think you’ve succeeded…

Cesar Carasa Loves His Women Dominican Like His Coffee

For a story in this week’s Miami New Times, I dialed up a few of the ladies suspended West Miami Mayor Cesar Carasa befriended during his sojourns to the Dominican Republic. This past November 30, Carasa was arrested on two misdemeanor counts of exploiting his public position. The unemployed real…

Scotch at Chop House, Jazz at Cape Cod Room, Cadbury Buried by Kraft?

Do You See Double From Too Many Single Malts?Next Tuesday, January 26, at 6 p.m., Chop House Miami will hold a Glenlivet Scotch Dinner. Outstanding single-malt Scotch whiskies will be paired with appropriately exquisite cuisine and fine Mederos cigars. Bobby Figgs of Chop House will host the festivities with the…