Editorial Voice

Letters from the issue of April 22, 2010

Rorschach testing at Seven Seas

Suge is wrong, Kanye is right, Luke says

Poor Snooki, when will she ever find love? Or was it always there right in front of her all along? She was dating some random gelled meat bag named Emillio, but apparently broke up with him when she thought he was seeing guidettes on the side while she was down in…

We’ve been waiting for Brisco’s official debut album Street Medicine for a couple years now. Being that he’s backed by Cash Money Records and Poe Boy Records, you can expect Street Medicine to be a monumental release. Or atleast we hope so. Well, to keep the streets satisfied, Brisco released…

The new Nespresso Boutique Bar on Lincoln Road is a stunning cafe where patrons can sit and enjoy any of 16 Grand Cru coffees. Nespresso is something of a pioneer in premium- portioned coffee (you know, the pods) — it’s as good a cup of espresso as you’re gonna get…

Fort Lauderdale-based Iron Forge Press creates some of the most eye-popping rock posters we’ve ever seen. Whenever possible, we’ll share their designs right here on Crossfade.Our last entry showed off a showman seahorse promoting Wilco’s Miami show, and today’s poster could not be more different. Showcasing the scrappy garage rock…

Jesus Loves You – So Give Us Your Money (Sublapse Records) While holding this seven-inch EP in my hands for what may be the umpteenth time, I finally noticed how goofy the band’s name looks across the top. It looks like something penned on the fly and without any thought…

In our Moving Units column, Mike Ramirez at Fort Lauderdale’s Radio-Active Records graciously keeps us up-to-date and comments on the current releases flying out of his store each week.Based upon the amount of this column devoted to teasing Record Store Day last week, it should come as little surprise to…

New Times scribe Gus Garcia-Roberts has a gem of a feature about the rise and complete ruin of South Florida hip-hop producer Scott Storch, who once played John Travolta’s role in Grease and can play any top 40 song from the past 20 years on the keyboard. His gifts for…

Another Culinary Cattle Call The Miami Wine & Food Festival begins this week (April 22-24). Tickets cost $250 for VIP (presumably meaning you won’t get treated like sheep), $100 at the door (baaah, baaah), and $75 in advance (baaah, baaah). If you want to attend the interactive dinner with Todd English,…

Next Wednesday’s show at the Fillmore Miami Beach by Band of Horses caps off a pretty awesome April at the venue. The show also marks, however, a preview for fans of the ex-Seattle/now South Carolina band’s third studio album, the upcoming Infinite Arms. It drops on Columbia/Fat Possum/Brown on May…

Sweatstock’s sweatiest moment came at the end. By the time noise-punk duo No Age finally stumbled onstage around 9 p.m., the crowd was bigger, drunker, and more chaotic than it had been all day. Fans of every kind packed a pit bounded by NE 2nd Ave., Sweat Records’ north-facing façade,…

Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness once made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for New Times. This week, Luke takes on Marion “Suge” Knight’s $1 million lawsuit against Kanye West and South Beach’s Shore Club, which was recently…

So the new Paragon movie theater that’s due to open in Coconut Grove this June will permit patrons to bring cocktails. Great. We already have a situation where going to the theater entails having to sit among food-obsessed Americans noisily stuffing their bloated faces with popcorn because of an utter inability…

Saturday was the absolutely perfect day to run around, buy records, drink a moderate amount of Strongbow cider, and consume a cornucopia of live music. Except: impressive Record Store Day events were planned for both Radio-Active Records in Fort Lauderdale, and Miami’s Sweat Records, and there are 27.5 miles separating…

We’re only two episodes into Basketball Wives, and I’m pretty sure this entire series is about two things: hefty promotion for the Miami restaurants and clubs that allow the cast to film, and the drama caused by Royce Reed’s constant cooch gooshing.Yes, MIA on Biscayne and Philippe Chow’s Philippe Restaurant…

Music vet and New Times scribe Lee Zimmerman shares stories of memorable rock ‘n’ roll encounters that took place in our local environs. This week, Jimmy gets a hit and Lee gets the nod.Prior to May 1977, Jimmy Buffett was just another wannabe singer/songwriter who did his time in Nashville…

After another shitty day at a shitty job in a shitty city, I decided to relax by listening to an old LP of sci-fi movie sound effects and watching shadows on my bedroom walls while blitzed on acid. At the time, this seemed like the best way to spend the…

Megan wanted a millionaire, instead she got a DUI.Megan Hauserman, the prolific reality TV star, was arrested yesterday morning on Miami Beach for driving under the influence. At about 3:15 a.m. police observed her 2008 BMW weaving between lanes and traveling 75 mph in a 55 mph zone. Police claim her…

Phil Spinella, owner of A&B Body Shop in Homestead, insists the damage he repaired on Mayor Steve Bateman’s city-issued SUV was caused by a blown tire.”There is no question about it,” Spinella said via a telephone interview. “The tire’s rubber housing took out the rear bumper. That’s what we billed…

We had some strange and creepy ones this week. Let’s get down to it: 5. Paul Edwards, busted for murder by his alleged victim’s beyond-the-grave text message. So cops investigating a missing female sent their top suspect, her boyfriend and Miramar resident Edwards, a text message from her phone number reading,…