Opinion & Commentary

Ice “Billion” Berg is “so fucking fly” that he “can stand on the ceiling.” And though standing on the ceiling is not one of the listed Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, given that Berg is going to buy your bitch and start claiming your daughter — never mind that…

Imagine a world where a croqueta preparada and a croque-monsieur met, fell in love, and had a baby. Not only would that sandwich would be bilingual in Spanish and French, but it would also change the croqueta game forever. That’s exactly what the folks who own the roving grilled cheese…

Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke calls out the brains behind Revolt Music Conference. I’m sick and tired of out-of-town entertainment moguls and executives…

The beige bulb of crackly pastry dough sprinkled with white powder could be hiding anything. You punch a fork into the flaky shell and a wisp of steam fills the air, which is already thick with incense and the blare of R.E.M.’s “Losing My Religion” set to a Middle Eastern…

Does Pitbull’s “Timber” make you wanna murder? Are you effin’ fed up with fake DJs like Paris Hilton getting paid $1 million per night? Time to play Ghosts ‘n DJs, a new, retro video game from a Spanish electronic music producer named Dr. Kuch. The mission… Rid mankind of all…

Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke tackles the Russell Wilson controversy. The great-great-grandfather of Seattle Seahawks quarterback Russell Wilson was a Confederate colonel’s slave…

Don’t let its proximity to the Design District fool you — Seven Seas Restaurant & Fish Market is all about the food. More specific, this blink-and-you’ll-miss-it gem in Little Haiti features inexpensive and expertly prepared Dominican and American dishes. Owner Nicholas Paulino and his wife, Ana, are originally from San…

Bathroom talk is usually off-limits during meals, but at Loba, a 3-month-old restaurant in MiMo, the lavatory is a conversation piece. That’s because apart from the complimentary dental floss (greatly appreciated), the wallpaper is composed of pages torn from the classic children’s book Where the Wild Things Are. It’s no…

Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke says Miami’s state attorney has fooled African-Americans in the city. On Memorial Day 2011, cops from Miami Beach…

With Seed Food & Wine Festival’s inaugural run all wrapped up, it’s clear that Miami’s plant-based culinary community was bigger, stronger, and way more dedicated than anyone probably imagined. Myself included. With five full days of plant-based soirees, celebrity hosts, chef dinners, and vegan vendors, this was no ordinary veg…

Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke explains the University of Florida’s problem with African-American quarterbacks. University of Florida quarterback Treon Harris has yet to…

There are very few people in the world who will pick you up and take both you and your singer, who live 25 miles apart, to an airport 45 miles away before the crack of dawn. Thankfully, my parents, both notorious early risers, are down for the cause. It doesn’t…

Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke says politicians need to start reading more. Last week, the developers of Miami Worldcenter, the massive $1.5 billion…

Lists are a big deal. Hate them or love them, they’re successful enough that corporate overlords at media companies of all stripes have handed down firm marching orders calling for lists with haste, creativity, and military-like regularity. But when the vaunted Michelin Guide for New York City — one of…

Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke commends elected officials who support police body cameras. Local politicians and union bosses opposed to putting body cameras…

Miami today is replete with truffle oil fries, Brussels sprouts studded with pork bits, and fried-egg-crowned burgers. From the beach to the suburbs, from north to south, scores of restaurants all serve the same predictably heavy fare under the gastropub banner. The concept was borne of England’s pub culture. Chefs…

Many people are shocked and disgusted by the alleged abuse Minnesota Vikings star Adrian Peterson inflicted on his 4-year-old son. He’s been indicted in Montgomery, Texas, for reckless and negligent injury to a child because he whupped his son’s backside with a switch, leaving the boy with open wounds and…

PLUR Warrior Can’t handle the beads: Everything about the article about Lady Casa and her move to bring “peace, love, unity, and respect” to EDM (“Kandi Kulture,” Ben Westhoff, September 18) shows why our culture will never be taken seriously as a youth movement. Or maybe I’m just bitter because…

Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke explains why Adrian Peterson isn’t out of the ordinary. Many people are shocked and disgusted by the alleged…