Friday Food Funnies

This week: VegetablesVegetables are a must on a diet.  I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread, and pumpkin pie.  ~Garfield (Jim Davis)Large, naked raw carrots are acceptable as food only to those who lie in hutches eagerly awaiting Easter.  ~Fran LebowitzLife expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables…

¿Que Pasa, M.I.A.? Walter Mercado For a Day

Editor’s Note: In this week’s column, José El Rey asked readers to submit questions and he’d “lead them to a better living.”My old lady doesn’t love me what should I do?CharlesI hate answering questions with more questions. Do you mean old lady like your mom? No, no, no… Old girl…

Best of Miami: Vote Now

Here’s a pretty good item from a couple years ago. Best of Miami is coming June 11. You can vote on a lot of other categories here. Best Road Rage Dump truck overturned on I-95 August 27, 2007 Chaos ensued when a dump truck flipped and spilled gravel, shutting down…

Letters from the Issue of May 14, 2009

Barry, Barry Racist More than meets the eye: As a former student at Barry University, I was disturbed by Natalie O’Neill’s May 7 story, “A Noose and a White Sheet.” My professors sometimes made odd comments that I wasn’t sure were racist or simply sarcastic. I had good experiences and…

Notes From the Soundboard: A Look Back at 1969

Notes from the Soundboard is a new column appearing every Wednesday on Crossfade, focused on pop music’s history and ongoing evolution. Lee Zimmerman shares insights and observations on how music continues to connect with the weirdness of the world. 1969 was, looking back with the benefit of 40 years of hindsight,…

Throwback Tuesdays: Cat Power – “He War”

A couple weeks ago I got a mailed copy of Elizabeth Goodman’s new Cat Power book, Cat Power: A Good Woman. Although it’s deeply reported, it’s unauthorized; Chan Marshall refused to speak with Goodman for the project, and thus all her quotes therein are indirect. It’s a fast-paced read, but…

Motto Suggestions For Miami Restaurants

Restaurateurs are increasingly seeking new ways to boost sales. I say: A good motto never hurts. And also: But a bad motto is funnier. In that spirit, allow me to lend some ideas for catchy tag lines — don’t worry restaurant owners, no charge for the suggestions!Motto for Einstein Bros…

What You Know Bout Expose?

Expose was a chart topping Miami based girl group that got caught up in a protracted legal battle involving labels, lawyers, songwriters and publishers. Eventually the original three members were replaced and the band continued, and you can find them at ‘relive the 1980s’ type concerts to this day.But what…

The Fashion Show: Sadder than a Pair of Harem Pants

It doesn’t bode well for The Fashion Show, Bravo’s brand-new rip-off of its former flagship program, Project Runway, that the most entertaining thing during its premiere was the previews of The Real Housewives of New York City reunion that aired during the commercials. To the right is the design of Miami-based …

Friday Food Funnies

This week:DietingI bought a talking refrigerator that said “Oink” every time I opened the door.  It made me hungry for pork chops.  ~Marie MottMy doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four — unless there are three other people. ~Orson Welles The second day of a diet is…

Letters from the Issue of May 7, 2009

Silence in Liberty City We’re better than this: Thank you, Mr. Elfrink, for reminding the black community of the plague that has rooted itself in our once-proud neighborhood. However, I am responding to your article with the hope that blacks who were once enslaved by antisocial behavior and enjoy freedom…

Video: Sam Cooke Live From the Harlem Square Club in Overtown

“Don’t fight it, we gona feel it tonight, ya understand.” And with these words Sam Cooke launched into “Feel It” on what would become his “Live At The Harlem Square Club, 1963” album, though it wasn’t released until 1985, well after his death. Jerry Wexler, the man who coined the term “Rhythm and…

¿Que Pasa, M.I.A.? Getting Friendly with Friendswithyou

Bro, everyone is trying to be cool. And act all tough. And act like they don’t know me. How did this happen? When did people stop smiling? People have told me that the transition between childhood and adulthood is rough, harsh and loaded with disillusionment. Not the case for me,…

The Great Miami Restaurant Bubble of 2009

We alluded to the bubble in this column yesterday. Here is a list of many, maybe most, but certainly not all of the mid-to-high end restaurants that have opened over the past 6 months (actually, the majority are fairly expensive). We’re leaving out lower end ethnic joints, pizza places, and…

Andre Pierre is Not a Clucker

This past April 30, I wrote about North Miami mayoral candidate Frank Wolland calling out opponent Andre Pierre for supposedly refusing to answer questions about his 4.9 percent ownership interest in North Miami Housing Ltd. The partnership was established by the developers of Biscayne Landing, a controversial 193-acre residential and…