Rick Scott Releases Ad That Proves He Was Not Hatched From Egg

Despite winning the Republican nomination to run for Governor, Floridians may not know that much about the early life of Rick Scott, the self-funded Naples billionaire with a shady business past. Despite rumors to the contrary, he apparently is not Lord Voldermort. Nor did he run in Minnesota’s 2008 senate…

Joe Garcia is Leading David Rivera in District 25, Says Democratic Poll

Conventional wisdom says that the 2010 midterm elections are supposed to be tough for Democrats. There’s already some conservative pundits who think that Republicans taking over the house is a done deal. Of course, national conventional political wisdom doesn’t always translate to Miami-Dade, and a new poll shows that Democrat…

Sarah Palin to Appear at American Airlines Arena on October 6

Sarah Palin, the world’s foremost political performance artist, has announced a Miami Date for her 2010 Tea Baggin’ ‘Round the Map American Tour! Yes, the pit bull in lipstick will be unleashed October 6 at the American Airlines Arena at the behest of a local Tea Party group. That’s just…

Sarah Palin is “The Perfect Feminist” Declares Victoria Jackson

Riptide’s favorite hometown SNL star turned wacko tea party songstress, Victoria Jackson, is back writing columns for Andrew Brietbart’s Big Hollywood. She’s decided Sarah Palin is “the perfect feminist.” Unfortunately she doesn’t seem to have much of a grasp on what feminism actually is, and take swipes at single mothers…

Kendrick Meek Takes Defiant Stance on Pressing French Fry Issues

Sure, there are pressing issues out there like health care, the economy and wars, but going by America’s ever growing obesity rate, the most important issue in all of America continues to be French fries. With the exception of the 2003 “freedom fries” controversy, politicians hardly address the issue that…

CNN Poll: Sink Leads Scott by 7, Rubio and Crist Deadlocked

CNN and Time magazine just released the latest poll in both Florida’s Gubernatorial and Senate races. While the poll conducted by Opinion Research shows Democratic Alex Sink with a surprising and comfortable seven point lead over Republican Governor candidate Rick Scott, the poll still shows Marco Rubio and Charlie Crist in a…

Alex Sink Wants You to Know She Is Not Secretly Barack Obama

Anyone out there confusing Alex Sink, the white lady with the slight Southern twang who’s running for governor of Florida, with Barack Obama, the African-American man with a powerful speaking voice who’s running the country? Apparently Sink is worried that her opponent, Rick Scott, might be confused that the two…

CEO of Penthouse Magazine Holding Fundraiser for Charlie Crist

There’s already the rather loose connection of Governor candidate Rick Scott to Playboy Mexico, and now it seems there’s a more direct connection between current Governor and Senate candidate Charlie Crist to the raunchier Penthouse magazine. According to Politico, the CEO of the adult brand will be holding a $500-per-person…

Unions Slam Mayor, Commission Over Proposed Pay and Benefit Cuts

They packed City Hall by the dozens this afternoon — the firefighters in bright yellow, the police in dark blue, the general service workers in civvies. They beat the floor, pounded the windows and whistled while their leaders excoriated the Miami City Commission over its proposal to slash salaries and…

Rumblings: Bud Chiles to Exit Governor’s Race

As we put it last week “Lawton ‘Bud’ Chiles will run for governor until he realizes what everyone knows: he can’t win.” Now there’s considerable rumblings that the Independent candidate whose main qualification is that he shares a name with his late father, Gov. Lawton Chiles, is set to announce…

What in Hell Is Charlie Crist Trying to Say About Gay Marriage?

We’re of two theories about Charlie Crist’s latest string of “clarifications” (or flip-flops) on some positions: (1) The guy doesn’t know what he actually believes and is being as vague as possible to attract as many voters as possible. (2) He has always personally held these positions, altered them to…