305 Photo of the Day: Here Gator, Gator
Today’s photo comes from Dkeros’ Flickr. If you’d like to see your photo here join our Flickr group. Follow Miami New Times on Facebook and Twitter @MiamiNewTimes…
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Showing 17777 - 17798 of 31974As Joe Paterno Retires, Al Golden Doesn’t Quite Shoot Down Rumor He’s Penn State Candidate
With a teary confession that he should have done more to investigate allegations that ex-defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky had molested a young boy in the team’s showers, legendary Penn State coach Joe Paterno announced today he will stop down at the end of the season. Scandal aside, that means that…
Here’s Video of Gov. Rick Scott (AKA DJ Govvy Gov) Dancing
Now, you may think that our tall, white, lanky, bald governor could be a horrible dancer, but we have to say he moves with such grace and enthusiasm it almost moved us to tears. His feet move like finely timed fireworks in slow motion, exploding with elegant energy. He’s a…
Crazy Lil Wayne Fans Trespass at His Miami Mansion, Get Cursed Out, Put Everything on YouTube
Lil Wayne’s block may be hot, but he’d appreciate it if his crazy fans would chill out and stay away from his Miami Beach crib.But two goofy looking Weezy fans recently got ahold of Wayne’s Miami address and did what any unreasonable person would do: grabbed their video camera and…
Naples Firefighter Arrested for Seeking Threesome with Teenage Girl and Her Mom
The threesome? The Holy Grail of any straight dude’s sexual desire. The mother-daughter threesome? A little strange, but we guess if everything remains legal and everyone is consenting, uh, OK. The mother-under-aged daughter threesome? Not only is that illegal and immoral, but it represents such a messed-up family dynamic of…
Ex-Mayoral Candidate Joe Sanchez’s FHP Car Covered In Poop, War With Miami PD Suspected
Dade County is quickly devolving into a real life Spurbury, Vermont, the town in cult classic Super Troopers where war erupts between cool, hipster Highway Patrol officers and douchebag townie cops. Except instead of fighting over Canadian drug shipments, Miami police and Florida Highway Patrol troopers are brawling over footage…
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In FCAT Workshop, Miami-Dade Teachers Asked to Arrange Words For “Fatness”
A group of Miami-Dade Schools public teachers at a recent FCAT workshop were given a sample test that will not restore your faith that the finest minds are running our school district. The teachers were asked to arrange synonyms for varying extremes of “fatness” from “most formal” to “most informal”…
Raúl Castro’s Daughter Joins Twitter, Quickly Calls Opposition Bloggers “Parasites”
A rare war of words is raging in Cuba.An hour after joining Twitter, Mariela Castro — president Raúl Castro’s daughter and possible successor — promptly got into an all-out digital girl fight with Cuban dissident Yoani Sánchez.Castro called Sánchez and other opposition bloggers “despicable parasites,” but Sánchez didn’t back down…
Convicted Pedophile Sues Florida Prison System For Making Him Eat Soy, Says It’s “Cruel and Unusual Punishment”
In order to keep food costs down, the Florida prison system routinely substitutes about half of the meat product in inmates’ meals with soy. But one inmate, Eric Harris, currently serving a life sentence for committing sexual battery on a young child, is suing the state, claiming that forcing him…
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305 Photo of the Day: It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like…
Today’s photo comes from GoboNDC’s Flickr. If you’d like to see your photo here join our Flickr group. Follow Miami New Times on Facebook and Twitter @MiamiNewTimes…
Miami Herald Puts Jimmy Kimmel’s Fake Michael Jackson Fan on Front Page
Despite the fact you probably read about it online yesterday afternoon, The Miami Herald decided to go big on their front page with the story of Dr. Conrad Murray’s guilty verdict in the manslaughter trial of Michael Jackson. The Herald illustrated the story with a picture of fans outside the…
Kenneshia Thurman Cut Infant With A Knife In Argument Over Bread Slices, Cops Say
We all know that times are tough, but in Marathon last night a scene straight out of Charles Dickens worst imagination played out when a brawl that erupted between neighbors over two slices of bread ended with a two-month-old baby getting sliced in the head with a knife.The trouble began…
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John Stirling, Canadian Busted With 800 Lbs of Coke, Tells FBI “There’s Nothing Wrong With Cocaine Trafficking”
A tip for all you would-be cocaine kingpins: When the FBI catches you off the coast of Colombia with more than 800 pounds of yeyo stashed in your boat, do not argue that “there is nothing wrong with cocaine trafficking.” That’s exactly the tact John Philip Stirling, a 60-year-old Canadian…
Bee Gees’ Robin Gibb Selling His South Miami Mansion for $4.25 Million
Lets do some real estate Jive Talkin’ about the nearly 10,000 square-foot mansion in South Miami where the Bee Gees’ Robin Gibb has been Stayin’ Alive for the past few years. Boogie Child, You Should Be Dancin’ at the thought of seeing the inside of this stunning home. You’ll be…
Rick Scott’s Jobs Plan Producing Mostly No-Benefit Gigs Paying $19,000 A Year
Last month Gov. Rick Scott bragged that the unemployment in Florida had dropped a tenth of one percent, with 64,000 jobs added between January and July. True enough, but now it turns out that more than half those jobs were health care, food service and hotel gigs paying low wages…
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Florida Man Freaks Out During Threesome, Throws Multiple TVs at His Wife
Jorge Daniel Silva was about to live a straight guy’s fantasy: his wife had agreed to let another woman into the bedroom mix for a threesome. But when the trio started kissing, something about the situation made Silva freak out. He then arranged a violent threesome between his wife and…
“Swinging Richards” Male Strip Club Concerns North Miami Beach Residents
North Miami Beach residents aren’t so concerned that there’s a new gay strip joint in town. They’re more concerned about the club’s name: Swinging Richards. For you slow folk out there, that pretty much translates to “Swinging Dicks.” While it’s certainly an apt name for a male strip club, some…
Hialeah Hospital Doc Sued for Allegedly Holding Adopted Baby Hostage
It sounds like a tale adoptive parents tell around a campfire to scare each other sleepless: A doctor, distraught over his failed marriage and custody fight, holds a baby hostage until the would-be new parents promise to return the kid to its birth mother.Yet that’s exactly what happened in real…
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Paul Bennett Turned His 1983 Nissan Into an Eco-Friendly “Time Machine”
Paul Bennett spent $3,000 on his 1983 Nissan Maxima. The Miami International Airport mechanic guesses he’s sunk another $15,000 in DIY renovations, turning the vehicle, which has 200,000-plus miles, into a creation straight out of Mad Max. First, so he could safely leave his dogs in the car, Bennett bought…
Vontae Davis Showed Up to Dolphins Practice Drunk
Vontae Davis, the Dolphin’s 2009 first-round draft pick, didn’t play in Sunday’s game. Rumors sparks that that Davis was left back at home because he got into a fight with Brandon Marshall, but apparently that’s not true. Or at least it’s not the full truth. Apparently, Davis was actually sidelined…
305 Photo of the Day: Buildings and Trees
Today’s photo comes from Rayh811’s Flickr. If you’d like to see your photo here join our Flickr group. Follow Miami New Times on Facebook and Twitter @MiamiNewTimes…
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Boucher Brothers Pickup Truck Hits Two Sunbathers on Miami Beach
Before yesterday afternoon, the biggest danger Boucher Brothers posed to sunbathers on Miami Beach was charging them an arm and a leg for beach chairs and umbrellas. Now, the company is just cutting to the chase and actually running over sunbathers’ arms and legs.An employee of the beach concessionaire ran…