Dolphins CEO Mike Dee told reporters today that he’s “open” to the idea of moving the team to Palm Beach County. Which seems ridiculous on so many levels, but threatening to move the team when you’re looking for a public handout is the oldest trick in the book. So it’s…
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Turns out Filomena Tobias, the woman captured in that now-iconic photo flipping off Joakim Noah during last night’s Heat-Bulls game, might be the most bizarrely interesting woman in the world. How bizarrely interesting? Well, this is the nut graph from a 2008 New York magazine story about the death of…
Orlando Llorente, a Kendall-based plastic surgeon, faces charges of kidnapping and attempted murder for allegedly torturing his girlfriend for nearly 16 hours after he read a message she’d posted on Facebook…
Across the nation, Americans have been gripped by the amazing escape of three young women kidnapped and imprisoned inside a house in Cleveland for a decade. Here in Miami, the horrific tale happens to bear an eery resemblance to this week’s cover story, in which two sisters suffer unspeakable horrors…
Middle-finger lady: Riptide salutes you, for you are truly the soul of Miami embodied. Your patterned silk shirt: Glorious. Your tan: Immaculate. Your leather purse, gold jewelry and white pants: Perhaps wrong for a basketball contest, but oh so right. And your look of pure glee as you shove your…
Miami is notorious for its bad drivers. We know that it would be futile to try and teach you (yes, you) about things like the “speed limit” and that there is a difference between a yellow light and a freshly turned green light, but we figured someone should at least…
Back up in your ass with the resurrection, Chicago. The Miami Heat got some sweet revenge Wednesday night beating the Bulls 115-78 — their worst ever playoff defeat, and at the same time the Heat’s all-time biggest playoff win — so that went well. Miami shot 50 percent from three…
Miami Cold Case Murder Solved With Recovered Memories
Tim Tebow to the Dolphins! How We Trolled Twitter to Believe a Crazy Rumor
Holly Jacobs’ nightmare began in 2009. That’s when naked photos of the Florida International University PhD student first popped up online. They soon went viral, appearing on hundreds of so-called revenge porn sites along with her name, phone number, and email address. Photos and videos were even sent to her…
Kiera Wilmot’s Story Blows Up, but Where’s the Herald?
People were left scratching their heads wondering why a man worth more than $4.4 billion was asking tax payers for more than $200 million to renovate his football team’s stadium. But it appears that Miami Dolphins owner Stephen Ross isn’t a total tightwad. He’s now pledged to give away at…
When a police officer pulled over a speeding red Mitsubishi going 57 in a 35 zone it seemed like it would be a pretty cut and dry speeding ticket situation. The officer turned on his lights to pull the car over. At first the driver turned off his lights and…
Today’s photo comes from Yali Carames Photography’s Flickr. If you’d like to see your photo here join our Flickr group. Follow Miami New Times on Facebook and Twitter @MiamiNewTimes…
Marlins Park was at the very least supposed to be something of an economic engine for the surrounding Little Havana neighborhood, but like so many other things promised about the deal, that turned out to be a lie, too. The Miami Herald reports this morning that three tenants who were…
A 90-year-old Florida man survived on nothing but snacks while he was trapped in his car for four days. Justyn Ambrozia of New Port Richey slipped and fell inside a grocery store last week, but instead of calling paramedics, the grocery store staff helped Ambrozia out to his car and…
Stolen songs. Rampant suspicions. Secretly recorded phone calls. Welcome to the twisted world of twerk. Last week, hip hop fans rejoiced when new song “Twerk It” by Pharrell Williams and Busta Rhymes appeared on websites. Local Miami rapper Monty $$ was furious, however. He already had a song called “Twerk…
There are lots of appropriate places to masturbate on a fine Florida Saturday afternoon. Your bedroom. A locked, private bathroom. Even the cabin of your sailboat probably would be AOK. However, the open deck of your sailboat — especially when that boat is parked on a public boat dock full…
Remember when the Marlins used to cover the whole upper deck at Sun Life Stadium with a big blue tarp so the game looked a little more full even though only a few thousand people showed up? That was one of the main reasons the team pushed for a much…
There’s hot new church trend sweeping Orlando’s thriving megachurch scene: pastors sleeping with ladies who aren’t their wives. For the third time in the last six months, a leader of a popular church in Orlando has resigned after admitting to damaging the sanctity of his marriage…
People may call Miami International Airport a lot of nasty things, but apparently “crowded” shouldn’t be one of them. According to a new analysis of airport capacity from Forbes.com, MIA came out as the least crowded major airport in America…
