Pour and Tour

Most of them have moved on by now, to places like Key West, Naples, Orlando. At the very least they’ve gotten real jobs (or tried to), gotten married (or tried to), and hunkered down in Kendall (despite trying not to). Maybe, if they somehow stashed enough dough, they bought a…

Bull Markets

Organic farmer Stanley Glaser dreams of a day when farmers markets blanket Dade County. He imagines a bonding of communities at those gatherings — neighbors meeting one another for the first time, children and dogs gamboling among vendors’ stands that overflow with produce and crafts. He envisions every supper table…

Billy’s Last Stand: The End

Seventy-four-year-old antique dealer Billy Herrero vowed he wouldn’t walk away from his “friends” — his sprawling array of period furniture, Oriental vases, vintage clothing, Art Deco trinkets, and unadulterated junk collected over six decades. And in the end, he didn’t. Early Christmas Eve, a few hours before he was to…

Brother, Can You Spare A Marlboro?

In a matchup the sportswriters are calling the Super Bowl of College Football, the University of Miami Hurricanes, ranked number one in the nation, will battle number-two Alabama in the Sugar Bowl on New Year’s Day. Fans will cram the New Orleans Superdome for the showdown of undefeated teams. Approximately…

Her Brother’s Keeper: Part 2

John Popejoy stood in a Plantation Key courtroom on November 10 and pleaded guilty to two counts of lewd and lascivious assault on a child. Sixteenth Circuit Court Judge J. Jefferson Overby sentenced Popejoy to seven years in state prison, to be followed by five years probation with mental health…

Sea Monsters Attack Miami Beach!

Dozens of terrified tourists scrambled to shore as vigilant beachcomber Glenn McGahee alerted them to his shocking discovery: hundreds of mysterious sea monsters! “It was horrible!” exclaims the 37-year-old Miami Beach bartender, who adds that he wasn’t sampling his own wares at the time of the troubling encounter. “Some of…

Letter? What Letter?

Considering the circumspect tenor of his campaign, Bill Clinton’s first major policy decision ranked as a doozy. Just one week after his triumph over George Bush, the president-elect stunned a phalanx of reporters massed around the State House rotunda in Little Rock, Arkansas, by promising to lift the 48-year-old ban…

To Catch a Cop: Part 2

When Dennis Whitt returned to Opa-locka from Tampa on December 11, he wore the broad smile of a vindicated man. The reason: barring a minor miracle, police officer Charles Jones would finally lose his badge. Whitt, a vociferous city manager and ex-cop, says the 46-year-old Jones is a “disgrace to…

Keep It Coming!

A panel of three appeals court judges has upheld an order requiring the City of Coral Gables to pay New Times $35,210 in attorney’s fees. Last Tuesday’s decision by Florida’s Third District Court of Appeal brings to $132,152 the amount of taxpayers’ money Coral Gables has spent so far trying…

Dark Passage

Legend has it that years ago the engineer who designed I-95’s Golden Glades interchange was hunted down at his modest apartment late at night by a horde of angry citizens carrying torches and sawed-off tailpipes. Roused from his sleep, the man was strapped behind the wheel of a failing VW…

Jammin’ In Havana

Monday, November 9 was the first day of an unprecedented practice in the 50-year history of Voice of America (VOA), the government agency born of the Cold War to broadcast U.S. news and culture to countries with limited freedom of expression. Between 10:00 and 11:00 p.m. on that Monday last…

Hide and Shriek

The autumn sun filtered through the hurricane-battered branches of Fairchild Tropical Garden, illuminating a scene of ecological and communal merriment below. Thousands of people had turned out for the Ramble, the garden’s annual horticultural festival on December 5 and 6, to celebrate the damaged Eden’s gradual recovery post-Andrew. They bought…

Stop! Thief! C-R-U-N-C-H!

Pictured in this month’s newsletter of the Dade County Police Benevolent Association is a tightlipped police officer bound in handcuffs, a blindfold, and a ball and chain. He is superimposed over a backdrop of the U.S. flag, and beneath him is the caption: “NOW! GO OUT AND DO A GOOD…

The Trickle Up Theory

While exploring an underwater cave system north of Lake Okeechobee, government hydrologist Clay Benson stumbles upon a mammoth fresh water spring, one huge enough to supply pure drinking water to thirsty South Florida for decades to come. But soon after reporting this coup to his boss, funny things start to…

HIV In the First Degree

Given the lurid particulars, it’s not surprising that no one wants to talk about the charges filed against Ignacio A. Perea, Jr. The son of a successful Hialeah business owner, 31-year-old Perea stands accused of raping three young boys last fall. “To hear these kids’ stories,” reports one source at…

Have Gun, Will Park

What first caught Roberto Sobrado’s attention was the Mercedes — that now-legendary blue sedan. But quickly Sobrado’s eyes fell to the driver, a plump man with a round face. “I took a look and I realized it was him,” Sobrado recalls. “I’ve seen his picture in the paper.” County Commissioner…

Down At the Hooch and Brooch

Just a few short hours after Miami’s late-night watering holes dry up, another kind of cantina ushers in the day. From Cutler Ridge to Bal Harbour, knowledgeable boozers have been drinking free for years at Dade’s upscale jewelry stores. “The best jewelry stores all serve drinks,” explains a veteran downtown…

The Scoop That Might Have Been

“Miami’s WSCV-Channel 51 is riding high these days, with the biggest scoop in the Spanish-language station’s seven-year history being picked up by the New York Times, the Miami Herald, the Associated Press, and the major TV networks.” So began a November 12 Miami Herald article about the bizarre saga of…

The War of the Two-By-Four

Sixty-year-old Louise Blair has heart trouble, asthma, and ulcers, and she hasn’t got a single tooth left in her head. Her 64-year-old husband Frank isn’t doing any better. He’s diabetic, choked with emphysema, fragile after two heart attacks, and he doesn’t trust his numb legs to take him beyond the…

Shaw ‘Nuff

Click. Hey, isn’t that Walter Shaw on Sally Jessy Raphael’s show? Click. And there he is with Montel Williams. Click. And Maury Povich click and Jerry Springer click and Jenny Jones. Click. My God, what is Walter doing with Whoopi? Walter Shaw, the long-time South Florida burglar who may have…

Here A Max, There A Max

Annette Beauplan picked up the phone, and for a few seconds she lost her bearings. She knew the voice on the line was her brother, Maxau Pierre. But she couldn’t figure out where in God’s name he was calling from. “He was flying back from Haiti that day and I…

The Art of Bankruptcy: Part 2

Fourteen months after federal regulators seized Miami’s Southeast Bank, one of the nation’s oldest and largest corporate art collections still sits under wraps in a downtown warehouse. But now a new bankruptcy trustee says he wants to liquidate the 4000-piece collection using a novel strategy. Rather than sell the Southeast…