Weekly News Wrapup – Cocaine, Soulless Stuffed Animals and Perez Hilton

Report Says Employment Practices Could Have Prevented Child Porn Scandal – According to a report by the Department of Children and Families’ Inspector General, the agency hired Al Zimmerman, now accused of luring teenagers to child pornography, and did not go through the proper measures of verifying his background. They…

Knightly Rescue from Miami Beach Road Rage

I’m ashamed to tell you this Mr. Construction Worker with an East Coast accent and sandy hair but, I usually cross the street when I see a group of hard hats clustered. I won’t again. You were near last week when, after 25 minutes of circling for a parking spot,…

Food News Flash: Bloise Leaves Wish

No details yet, other than that earlier this week Michael Bloise, one of Miami’s star chefs, left his position at Wish restaurant in The Hotel on South Beach. Bloise’ menus at Wish were as provocative, whimsical, and innovative — not to mention tasty — as any in town. Who else…

Magic City Kitty – Help, I’m a Hi-Tech Call Girl!

Hello, Kitty A few nights ago I was at a club with a few of my girls and we got reeeally hammered. More like flashing-random-bathroom-attendants tipsy than unconscious-in-the-ER drunk, but out of control is out of control, right? Anyway, we partied pretty hard, and by the end of the night…

StyleSoldiers – It Came From The Green Lagoon

If you saw this coming down the street, nine times out of ten you would run in the opposite direction. The hair do’, the sunglasses and the billowing green sheet she tried to pass off as a dress combine to make a horrendous outfit. It does, however, make the perfect…

Perez Hilton Picks a Fight

It happened in 1996. Mario Lavandeira Jr. can’t recall the exact date, but it was late in his senior year at Belen Jesuit Preparatory School, the all-boys Catholic institution that relocated to Miami from Cuba in 1961 after alumnus Fidel Castro overthrew Fulgencio Batista. Educators, parents, and students filled Belen’s…

Cops Are Cranky

$50,000 News Flash! Cops Are Cranky Filed under: News Results from a Miami Police Department “work climate” study are in, and it suffices to say the men and women who patrol the streets aren’t too happy with the department’s top brass. According to the survey, 64 percent “of those who…

Kid Stuff

On a recent Thursday about 1 p.m., Carlos Manrique is driving his white Hyundai SUV west on the Dolphin Expressway when he grins and compares himself to the founder of software giant Microsoft. “Look at Bill Gates,” he says. “He didn’t graduate college.” The 48-year-old uses this shaky logic to…

Cane Collapse

On Sunday, you, dear Miami fan, watched the Hurricanes nearly claw their way past the favored Texas Longhorns into the Sweet 16. And as you did, you probably thought the same thing as everyone else in the 305: Since when do butchers dress in black-and-white vertical stripes? You’ll be comforted…

He Saw Jesus In The Bathroom

Little did Theo Grimes from Miami Gardens know that when he stepped out of the shower he would come face to face with Jesus. Well, it was the image of Jesus on his bathroom wall, but that was still a creepy sight. Just imagine, you’re toweling off and next thing…

Miami is Clean???

Last week Forbes magazine named Miami the cleanest city in America. Yeah, I scoffed too. And so did most people commenting on the Forbes.com article. The study gave the most weight to air pollution and ozone levels, followed by lesser factors like water quality and per-capita spending on cleanup and…

Jason Taylor Is The Mambo King, Bitch

Jason Taylor once again kicked some dancy ass on Dancing With the Stars last night. He danced the Mambo and impressed the judges with his nimble feet and devilish good looks. He also scored a 9 from all three judges! Tonight is double-elimination night. Two contestants will be gone by…

Crane Crash Kills Two

A piece of a construction crane fell from the top of the 46-story Paramount Bay high-rise, plummeting through a nearby structure and killing two people this afternoon. The building, at 20th Street and Bayshore Drive, was ringed with Fire-Rescue vehicles, while three helicopters buzzed overhead. “They were loading a piece…

Magic City Kitty – Private Dick

Hello, Kitty A few weeks ago I met a guy that I really like. We’ve been going out on dates to restaurants, movies and etc., but I’m still not sure if he has a girlfriend or not. I kind of think that he does because he’s never let me come…

Magic City Kitty – I Saw Titties!

Hello, Kitty A few days ago, I went to my neighbor’s house to drop off a DVD I had borrowed, and now I really wish that I had called her first. I got there around 6:30ish and the lights were on, I could hear music playing, but after knocking for…

Side-scrolling Sonic (Sort Of)

By now, you gaming faithful have already watched the Sonic Unleashed leaked video on Youtube (like most of us, you guys are probably also salivating at the idea). Here it is for you folk that haven’t seen it…

Political Protest on Wheels

Kyle Munzenrieder “Where did all these beautiful people come from?” asked a shoeless man wandering along strumming his guitar for pocket change. Maybe he felt a sense of kinship with the 35 cyclists who had gathered at the corner of Lincoln Road and Washington Avenue for a politically charged, alley…

2008 Dolphins Mock Draft

I’ve been writing about the Dolphins draft in one form or another since 2005. More often than not, I have been right, they have been wrong. A quick re-cap: 2005: I said the Fins should draft Braylon Edwards. They took Ronnie Brown instead. Now, Edwards is blowing shit up in…

Love and Cancer

Brain cancer, unemployment, and love — is this the recipe for a fulfilling life? According to a New York couple, making it through the week alive and under a roof is enough to say they’re blessed. “Every single week we make it by I have a laugh,” said Virgilio Castro,…