Is Ozzie Guillen’s time in Miami over? It’s hard to imagine a more disastrous season for a manager. Not only did the man manage to piss off half of his fan base by declaring his “love” for Fidel Castro, but he also sunk a promising start into a prolonged team…
We all know that when it comes to chicken nuggets, emotions tend to rise high, but, as with everything, those delicious little meat nibblets are never, ever, ever an excuse for domestic violence.John J. Valentin of West Melbourne, Florida apparently got so upset when his nephew cooked too many chicken…
Seems like the University of Miami can’t hold onto an athletic director. Current AD Shawn Eichorst officially offered his resignation today and will take the same job at the University of Nebraska. This will be the second athletic director in a row UM has lost to a bigger school…
Last night, Riptide arrived home from sort of watching the debate at a club with an open bar and a wall projector to find out through some social media channel or another that a far more telling meeting of the minds occurred, right here in Miami Beach: that of Kim…
The random beatdown is a staple of prison life, right up there with the occasional cafeteria riot and your first bad batch of wine made in a toilet. So the fact that Calvin Kingcade got stomped by a group of fellow inmates shouldn’t surprise anyone. Kingcade’s problem, however, was that…
As Walter Cronkite once said: “Well, that debate was one flaming pile of rancid cat shit.”*For those of you who didn’t suffer through last night’s 90-minute cojone-eating contest between Mitt Romney and President Barack Obama, here’s your 10-second summary:Romney wonObama lostRomney snorted Ronald Reagan’s ashes before going on stageObama performed…
Florida Sports You Can Get Excited About
Tony Galeota: From Running Porky’s, Miami’s Most Notorious Strip Joint, to Rotting in a Panamanian Jail
See also: “From Porky’s to Panamanian Prison: Web Extra.”
Miami Marlins Keep Lying About Stadium
Miami Driver Gets a $13,500 SunPass Bill
North Miami Mayor Andre Pierre’s Bus Bench Blunder
Even ugly animals need protective love too.The Florida bonneted bat was once a common site in South Florida, but the Center for Biological Diversity believes there may be less than 300 left in the wild now. The odd looking winged mammal has only been spotted recently in 12 different sites…
Today’s photo comes from GoboNdc’s Flickr. If you’d like to see your photo here join our Flickr group.Follow Miami New Times on Facebook and Twitter @MiamiNewTimes…
The Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission has decided to be a party pooper. They’ve pulled the plug on those “alligators swimming with kids” pool parties that so captivated us, hence killing an important part of Florida culture and tradition that never got a chance to properly flourish…
We’ve spent the past few weeks scoping out South Florida’s social media landscape in search of the best of the web. Our eyes are a bit bleary from staring at our computer screens and iPhones, but here it is: our first annual South Florida Web Awards. From the apps you…
An average family will spend hundreds of thousands of dollars raising a kid up until the age of 18, but that number might be significantly higher in Miami. According to an analysis by Bundle.com, Miamians spend the the third most on their bebés behind only two New York City boroughs…
After Genting Group’s aggressive push to shove gambling down the throat of the Florida legislature this year failed spectacularly, gambling interests have taken a more low key approach to eventually opening the sunshine state to more gaming. They may be looking to put a constitutional amendment on the ballot in…
Manatees across the waters of Florida can breath a sign of relief. The woman who was caught on camera hitching a ride on back of an endangered sea mammal has turned herself in.Ana Gloria Garcia Gutierrez says that she was new to the area and didn’t think there was anything…
Every week, Riptide’s crack team of employment termination scientists gauge just how fireable loathed Dolphins General Manager Jeff Ireland has become following his latest series of horrific blunders. So how close is the Ginger Menace to getting canned this week?Late yesterday, word spread that the Dolphins had cut wide receiver…
The gay mafia is after Jack Hakimian. The head of North Miami’s Impact Miami church has made a name for himself by fighting a proposed strip club in the neighborhood — a fight that found him allied with PBS affiliate WPBT. That alliance got WPBT in trouble with North Miami…
“No matter what a stripper tells you,” Chris Rock once sang, “There’s no sex in the Champagne Room.” Rock had obviously never been to a strip club here in Miami. As this week’s feature on notorious Hialeah strip club Porky’s shows, there is most definitely sex in champagne rooms all…
Who is Mitt Romney’s biggest fan in the NFL? Apparently it’s Dolphins owner Stephen Ross. The billionaire developer has donated over $125,000 to Republican causes this election cycle, including $100,000 to a pro-Romney super PAC…
