Frances Nash Mmmmmm In a post from her http://f-i-n.diaryland.com/index.html”>Sunshine State blog aptly titled”strawberry fields forever,” Frances Nash writes about a recent tour of Homestead U-Pick Knaus Berry Farm, where “the air smells sticky and sweet, like the strawberries boiled by the sun.” Her photos and prose (“their strawberry shakes taste…
Calvin Godfrey Feeling guilty after dropping your kid’s braces money on a stripper at Club Rollexx? Just head a couple blocks south on Unity Boulevard, and pick up a nice painted statue of Jesus for the front lawn. The kids will forgive all your trespasses, and so will He! This…
Webber: “Pass the bottle — er — ball!” If the Detroit Pistons look a little sluggish at the AAA tonight, blame it on the Patron. Last night at SoBe club, The Fifth, Piston Chris Webber had a birthday party, his so-called “Celebrity Birthday Extravaganza.” Joined by teammates Rasheed Wallace, Chauncey…
City of Miami Sgt. Robert Laurenceau is having his Taser moment. On Thursday morning, the latest issue of Miami New Times hit the streets with a story about cops facing off in a traffic stop gone wrong this past fall. Laurenceau played a prominent role in the odd tale of…
I recently got hold of an (advance?) copy of the March Miami Monthly —in fact, it was lying on the floor of the Men’s locker room at the Sports Club LA. I must say, I was shocked and chagrined. Published by Mass Media Enterprises, which on its web site touts…
Isn’t everyone getting sick of reading about every fucking phone call and gift-giving session that takes place between Castro and Chavez? Last time I checked, picking up a phone is not a sign of stable health. If Fidel really wants to strike fear into the hearts of the American Military…
Carrrrrreful This Sunday, the county Parks and Rec Department and the Florida Bicycle Assoctation will host a “Road 1 Bike-Ed Class” at Marjory Stoneman Douglas Biscayne Nature Center in Crandon Park. Class curriculum includes fixing flats, choosing a bike, and riding safety. The flyer boasts that “Students will gain confidence…
Just as the sun was reaching its highest point in the sky, Lou Greenwell realized he could see again. During a morning spent paddling across Blackwater Sound just off Key Largo, Greenwell, 70 years old, had begun to wonder if there was any end to the shadowy mass that stretched…
Payfront Park Filed Under: Culture First-run movies every night on a 60-foot-high screen in a beautiful grassy spot by the water? Excellent idea. Fencing off about 40,000 square feet of prime downtown Miami green space 24 hours a day, seven days a week? Maybe not so excellent. Since it set…
Larry Jackson could be excused for disliking cops. After all, the 48-year-old found himself on the wrong end of a Taser this past September 2 after three City of Miami police officers mistakenly stopped him at gunpoint, then — he claims — manhandled and cursed at him. The thing is,…
On a cold February night, as big rigs chugged in and out of the secluded industrial loop that is NW 79th Avenue, a half-dozen young men swathed in diamond jewelry and baggy clothing sipped Dixie cups filled with Hennessy in a warehouse parking lot in Doral. The air outside the…
Say what you will about radio personality (a weak description, I know, but aren’t you tired of the term “shock jock?”) Howard Stern: These days, he’s looking positively wholesome compared to his doppelganger, Anna Nicole Smith paramour Howard K. Stern. Stern was in Miami over the weekend, having recently popped…
Conquering the world, one cup at a time The good people at Starbucks — otherwise known as Home Of The $5 Coffee — want you to know it’s okay to hold up the line and order an extra-hot, tall, lite-foam, half-caf, extra sprinkles, non-fat, mocha-capp. In fact, they encourage it…
Approximately two decades after it hit New York City, the great cupcake baking trend appears to have finally made its way to Miami, the bottom of America’s funnel. While the editorial staff at New Times are partial to the vegan creations of staff writer Tamara Lush (who modestly deflects credit…
A press champion This week in Cuba: Cuban officials have declined to renew a reporting visa for a reporter for the Chicago Tribune, Gary Marx, saying that his stories have been “negative.” The reporter has been ordered to leave Havana pronto. And…bedridden dictator Fidel Castro has received a press freedom…
Who thought Democracy in action could be so entertaining? On Tuesday night, Miami’s Urban Environment League held a quaint-sounding discussion on the future of Overtown as part of its ongoing “dinner series” at the Miami River Inn. After a wine reception and a hearty pasta dinner, fireworks ensued. “I might…
As we drove down Okeechobee Road toward Club Rancho Grande last Saturday, my friend started recalling the last time she was there: She got stuck in traffic for an hour, she remembered, because a gunshot victim was being airlifted from the rancho next door. That was Rancho Gaspar, site of…
With sweat pouring down his chiseled torso and a crimson blanket of blood cloaking his cocoa-color skin, Din “Dinyero” Thomas turned and padded barefoot away from his opponent, Clay Guida. Head back, mouth open, he gasped, desperately trying to quell the burning fire in his lungs. It was little more…
His Satanic Majesty’s Request Filed Under: Flotsam Sixty-year-old José Luis de Jesús Miranda has called himself the reincarnation of the apostle Paul; “the Other,” a spiritual super-being who would pave the way for Jesus Christ’s second coming; and, eventually, God’s son incarnate. “My purpose,” he explained to New Times last…
Royal Caribbean Cruise Lines and its fifteen-year-old Majesty of the Seas could use a little good news. The Miami-based company has been under assault lately. On January 20 the Los Angeles Times reported the world’s second-largest cruise ship firm had apparently tried to bury reports of 200-plus rapes, batteries, and…
Traffic on Collins Avenue in Miami Beach was at a standstill. A few tired-looking drivers rolled down windows and craned their necks, trying to discern the reason for the delay. First came the Thai dancers, their satin costumes gleaming in the streetlights, fingers splayed, cheeks rouged, golden spires on their…
Back up the Brinks truck, baby, it’s budget-busting time: Readers of this morning’s Herald can be forgiven if the dollar signs in their eyes distracted them from the finer print. First, the lead story asked this tantalizing question: “Could Florida end the homeowner property tax?” The answer: Well, maybe, but…
