Text-Messaged Proof that Miami is Alive and Bleeding

On Wednesday, we received the following text message from Disco Rick, multi-platinum producer of the above classic, “Your Momma’s on Crack Rock”: From:Disco Rick DIAMONDS CABARET ROBBERY @CLUB 2DAY WAS SAD. MANAGER DAN WAS FRONTED BY 2 GUNMEN. DAN WAS SHOT 3TIMES AS HE RETURNED FIRE & SHOT & KILLED…

News Roundup

Truth time: setting straight all the lies and misleading logic used in last night’s debate. [Washington Times] Wachovia is selling itself to Wells Fargo. It seems like I don’t need to make that bank run after all. [NY Times] There are all these nasty, nasty rumors (on the Internets? Yes,…

Debate Watch: Obama’s Party @ Tap Tap

South Beach’s favorite Haitian restaurant One thing is certain after Sarah Palin’s St. Louis showdown with Joe Biden, or at least after watching the debate with 30 to 40 Democrats packed into a stuffy room above Tap Tap: Liberals may have finally found the accent and vernacular they hate even…

Live Blogging the Vice Presidential Debate

Tonight is the hotly anticipated Vice Presidential debate. In one corner we have Sarah Palin, who has lowered expectations so much that if she manages to put together at least one complete sentence she’ll be declared the winner. In the other there’s Joe Biden, some old, white dude who’s so…

CBS 4 Schedules a Diaz-Balart Debate Double Header

After a bit of wrangling, CBS4 WFOR, has finally confirmed that they’ll be airing debates between the candidates in Miami’s tightest congressional races. Both debates will be broadcast on October 15th, the same day as the final Presidential debate. The debate between incumbent Republican Rep. Mario Diaz-Balart (25th district) and…

Castroneves Charged with Tax Evasion

Castroneves will be dancing a legal tango with the IRS now. *guffaw* IndyCar and Dancing With The Stars champ Helio Castroneves and his sister, Kati, were charged with tax evasion in Miami today. Castroneves reportedly owes $5 milllion. If the feds collect, it could pay for about 1/140,000th of the…

Magic City Kitty – Abortion Schmamortion

Hello, Kitty I started sleeping with a co-worker after a few too many beers at an office happy hour sent us into a long night of fucking. Though I hadn’t felt sparks before, we continued to sleep together for four months even though he was in a relationship. Things got…

KAWS Paintings Stolen?

Over the weekend, local art blog Swampstyle — an always-interesting read, by the way — posted a somewhat shocking rumor: two paintings by graffiti bomber turned art world hotshot KAWS had been stolen from his exhibition at the Emmanuel Perrotin Gallery. KAWS — real name Brian Donnelly — is that…

Are Hillary Hold-Outs Still a Concern?

Apparently the question of whether Hillary’s Florida supporters will end up voting for Obama or McCain is still a concern. Anecdotally, most Hillary hold-outs I know have come around (many after the announcement of Sarah Palin and her pro-choice stances). Maybe the powers that be want to keep the narrative…

Obama Now Ahead in Most Florida Polls

On Monday we noticed Five Thirty Eight had switched their Florida electoral projection from McCain to Obama, and now Real Clear Politics shows Obama ahead in their Florida polling average for the first time in the campaign, reflecting Obama’s lead in most recent sunshine state polls. It’s Obama’s 48.6 to…

News Roundup

The revamped bailout bill passed the senate by a wide margin. [WSJ] Officials are investigating the death and mutilation of a Crocodile found on UM’s campus. [NBC 6] But Alligator wrestling is still “cool.” [Herald] Will the Fontainebleau be open in time for Heidi Klum and her Victoria’s Secret friends…

Photos: Fashion Week Miami Beach, Day 1

Justin Namon Bejeweled Swimwear runway show at The Setai. Click here for the full slideshow. ZOMG!!! Fashion Week is here! Er, not New York Fashion Week. And, no not LA Fashion Week. We are talking about the bastard child of Fashion Weeks in the United States, Funkshion’s Fashion Week Miami…

Invasion of the Amazon Women

The elevator doors part, and Mikayla Miles joins a threesome of clean-cut executives on the way up to the ninth floor. It’s 8 p.m., and the businessmen, still in their suits, cease chatting to stare at the dimpled, green-eyed blonde. A muscular 220 pounds, she towers over them at six…

South Florida’s Stadium Madness

It’s been a bad year for sports venues. The Orange Bowl went boom. The Miami Arena imploded. Even the House that Ruth Built is no more. Of course, at a time of economic Armageddon, we’re building more. The Heat and Panthers already nailed us for a cool half-billion. FIU frittered…

Bestiality in Allapattah’s Curtis Park

Just after lunchtime Tuesday, September 18, Miami Police Det. Gary Jackson arrived at Curtis Park in Allapattah to investigate a crime. It wasn’t a typical purse snatching or pick-up football brawl. What he found must have shocked him. Two city park employees sat Jackson down and described the following: While…

French Couple to Walk from Miami to Argentina

In a Comfort Inn across from Miami International Airport, a normal interview morphs without warning into a vigorous session of “pump the American for potentially lifesaving information.” “Crocodiles, yes?” William Guinaraes asks, his searching eyes open wide behind wire-rimmed glasses. “They are a real worry?” “Yes,” Riptide nods solemnly. “And…

Collection Agents and Guns Don’t Mix in Miami Shores

In October 2005, Joanne Hatton spotted a woman rifling through her parents’ mailbox across the street from her Miami Shores home. The mysterious five-foot-six-inch brunette, who wore business-casual slacks, snagged an envelope and headed for her black Ford SUV. Hatton, an assertive 50-year-old green-eyed pharmaceutical consultant, grabbed a .38-caliber pistol…

Bikini.Com Wants In On That Palin Action, Too

Yeah, you’ve seen this picture a million times, but really, what else were we going to illustrate this with? Miami Beach-based websites have a special touch with bizarre press releases some how relating their offerings to Sarah Palin. First WigSalon.com hit the soft news jackpot by heralding their Wasilla wigs,…