The Slap Heard ‘Round the County: “Hey Pussy, Do You Remember Me?”
“He tried in a cowardly way to provoke me and like a little girl brushed my hair with his nails.”
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Why Do Some Miami-Dade Residents Hate Peacocks So Much?
“Are we actually talking about sentencing the peafowl to death right now?”
Fort Lauderdale Lynched Rubin Stacy, Then Named a Street After Him
“I didn’t know terrible stories like that happened here in South Florida, right here in Broward County.”
Is Omicron Over? COVID Cases Down 50 Percent in Miami-Dade
The variant appears to be in retreat, but this is no time to get complacent about COVID-19.
Fecal Matter: Miami Beach’s Old Sewage Pipes Keep Breaking, Threaten Biscayne Bay
A pressurized sewage pipe on Dade Boulevard has suffered multiple ruptures since 2019.
Tech Bros, Exotic Animals: HOA Pissed After Silicon Valley Transplant’s Wild Party
A lemur, giant snake, and approximately 120 people attend Lucy Guo’s party at One Thousand Museum.
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Butt Is It Art? In Tamarac, Hindsight Isn’t Always 20/20
Elected officials in Tamarac nixed a proposed public artwork because “it looked like a woman’s butt.”
Five Reasons to Stop Rooting for the Miami Dolphins
Go ahead, buy that Tampa Bay Buccaneers jersey! Order the Kansas City Chiefs cap!
Silver Bluff Street Wars: Some Residents Feel Trapped by City-Installed Roadblocks
“I hate these roadblocks every day of my life.”
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Don’t @ Her: Sen. Ileana Garcia Abruptly Vanishes From Twitter and Facebook
The vanishing act comes after Garcia voted against an amendment to Florida’s proposed 15-week abortion ban that would make an exception for rape survivors.
You Can Buy This Haunted House in Little Haiti for $3.5 Million
There have been reports of a one-legged apparition floating in midair.
Bank Robbery Suspect Made It Rain in a Miami Gardens Church Parking Lot
It was scene straight out of a heist movie.
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Chicken of the Trees: The Ultimate Guide to Catching and Cooking an Iguana
During the recent cold snap, Florida native Ryan Ausburn caught more than a dozen iguanas to cook up.
New Billboards Remind South Floridians That “Jew Hate” Is Wrong
“Does your church need armed guards? ‘Cause our synagogue does.”
Genital Inspections, Deadnaming: Transgender Protesters Sue County for Mistreatment in Jail
Three transgender activists say they were humiliated and subjected to genital inspections in jail.
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Part-Time Layout Editor Wanted
Miami New Times has an immediate opening for a part-time layout editor. Come work with us!
Calusa Residents Crash Bacardi Sailing Party
Residents wanted to address their complaints to the man they say is threatening their neighborhood.
Five Reasons Miami #HeatCulture Is Real
From player development to conditioning, here are five examples that #HeatCulture is real.
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Woman Alleges Chris Brown Raped Her at Diddy’s Miami Yacht Party in 2020
The woman alleges she was raped during a yacht party at the home of Sean Combs in December 2020.
Feds: Cryptsy Founder Stole More Than a Million Dollars in Users’ Cryptocurrency
Federal authorities say Vernon orchestrated a “sophisticated theft scheme” between 2013 and 2015.
Stoptional: The Curious Case of Westchester’s Invisible Stop Sign
New Times witnessed at least ten vehicles blow through the universally recognized octagonal symbol of stoppage.
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Joe Carollo Campaign Donor Tapped for Miami Commission Corruption Probe Tied to…Joe Carollo
Attorney Ricardo “Ricky” Gomez, tapped to lead the investigation, contributed $500 to Carollo’s re-election campaign in 2021.