C’est Chic, Le Freak

Upper SoBe is alive with the sounds of music. Unfortunately for Julie Andrews, there’s no yodeling, but there’s plenty of house, electronic, dance, and hip-hop in the air. The latest destination is located on 23rd Street in a nondescript building that is home to an indoor/outdoor club experience vowing to…

Stanley Fish’s Top 10 Films List for NY Times Is Perhaps the Worst Ever

Florida International University professor and all around curmudgeon Stanley Fish is up to his old — and we do me old — tricks in the New York Times again.You might recall Fish’s classic work of grumpy grandpa journalism in the Times last summer, when the 70-year-old eminent postmodern scholar “discovered”…

Bill Clinton Charms the Fontainebleau

As easy as he is to mock with decades-old jokes, we’ve got to hand it to Bill Clinton — the dude can warm a room like Wayne Newton on crystal meth.  Not that last night’s Fontainebleau crowd was a hostile audience. About 300 of Miami’s glitterati — among them sunglass mogul…

Q&A With South Florida Real World: Brooklyn Cast

Last night, Real World: Brooklyn made queer TV history, thanks to the first ever transgender cast member, a South Florida male-to-female named Katelyn Cusanelli. The introspective, self-proclaimed computer geek, who went to McPhatter Technical School in Davie and Palm Beach Community College talked to Riptide yesterday about hormone therapy, “escaping”…

Art Capsules

Russian Dreams … Through February 8. Bass Museum of Art, 2121 Park Ave., Miami Beach; 305-673-7530, www.bassmuseum.org. Tuesday through Saturday 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. Sunday 11 a.m. to 5 p.m. At the Bass, this selection of cutting-edge works by contemporary Russian artists — which includes painting, photography, video, and…

Indulge in the Young at Art

Our mama always hoped we were the child prodigy in the family. She pushed us from dance classes to piano lessons to soccer practice, hoping one activity would help us escape a lifetime of mediocrity and push us into the star-spangled heights of greatness. We proved to be simply average…

After the Office

Like John Lee Hooker sang, they call it “Stormy Monday,” but Tuesday is just as bad. Your workweek started out with promise — Cuban coffee and pastelitos in the morning, but somewhere in the sludge and drudgery of the afternoon, the weight of the world came to rest squarely on…

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year

A friendly and merciful sun peeks out from behind fluffy white clouds. Something ruffles our hair and the leaves. What is that, a breeze? Must be winter in Miami, otherwise known as the best time to live at the end of America’s wang. With the pleasant weather comes all manner…

New Year, New Coach, New Attitude

It’s about time we give it up for Peter DeBoer. The rookie head coach wasn’t exactly a hot name around the NHL when the Florida Panthers hired him, and not many people expected him to be able to do much with a team missing its offensive leader and captain, Olli…

Hey, Hey, Ho, Ho

Of all the shameful, wrong, and all-around unwise decisions that soon-to-be-former POTUS George “Dubya” Bush made in his too-long tenure (and there are so, so many), the Guantánamo Bay Detention Camp has gotta rank among the worst of them. Ever since the center was opened in 2002 to house “enemy…

Aria-Singing Siberian Superstars

Florida Grand Opera is grand, indeed, being one of the oldest opera houses in the nation. It’s kicking off 2009 with the Superstar Concert Series — which should star Molly Shannon from Saturday Night Live,/i>, but doesn’t. Instead, FGO is pairing opera luminaries and giving them three concerts this year…

South-Side Syndicate

Southwest Miami-Dade is a universe unto itself. Far removed from the urban core, its denizens still carry the distinct 305 swag, albeit heavily tempered by a deeply entrenched agro-centric history. Some folks say the recent spread of subdivision hell is choking out the Redland, and they’re right. But Miami’s bountiful…

Race and Revolution

Fidel Castro famously wrote he had “lived in the belly of the beast” and understood his enemy, America. Dr. Carlos Moore, a prolific author, journalist, and scholar, has returned the favor, penning an insider’s perspective of the plight of black Cubans who were socially and politically shunned by Castro’s revolution…

Your Sunday Reading Material, Come to Life

God bless the Gray Lady. In a time of dire news for print media, the New York Times is somehow still going strong, arriving on our doorstep every Sunday morning with a satisfying thwack that promises in-depth political analysis, breaking news, and the good stuff — more arts and culture…

I Want a Pony and a Kazoo

In a city where friendliness is often met with confusion, you have to wonder from which magical star Rachel Goodrich was plucked before materializing in the 305. When she steps on a stage — her grin bright and stretched, her kazoo standing at attention — you just want to cheer…

Put Three Rings on It

When we were kids, the circus was a wondrous place filled with happy-faced clowns and acrobatic animals. But when we recently tried to revisit our youth one sober Sunday afternoon, we discovered this pill was one best swallowed with a splash of vodka or a visit from Puff the Magic…

Flinging in the New Year

Any ballet performance that includes dancers frantically flinging themselves about the stage while wearing candy-pink costumes deserves a spot at the top of post-holiday to-do lists. Forget about taking the tree to the dump; instead join ballet fans/curious gawkers for Miami City Ballet’s amazing three-part show Program II. To avoid…

My Ink Is Bigger than Yours

The first prick stings your skin. Hurting more than a typical shot from your MD, it might bring a tear to a virgin’s eye, but a seasoned pro knows the pain from a tattoo artist’s needle smarts way less than a stab from an angry lover’s butter knife. For some,…

Bring the SoulSexy Back

This weekend you can give your record player and dusty 8 track a rest because TruSoul Entertainment, B-Side Entertainment and Moxxi Magazine are bringing soul music back to South Beach. Hosted by Ingrid B and our very own sex columnist, The Magic City Kitty, the spirits of living legends Chaka…

Moan at the Moon

Popular legend would have you believe people go loony-toons once the full moon rolls around. Truth is, dog bite occurrences do double, but as long as you keep your mitts out of the Alpo, you should be safe. A better way to spend this astrological event is at Miami’s newest…

Kitty Says a Fool in Love Is Still a Fool

Hello, Kitty: I’ve been dating my girlfriend for more than a year, and lately she has been acting funny. In the beginning of our relationship, we would go out, talk all the time over the phone, and if we didn’t talk over the phone, we would text each other. But…