An Open Letter to the President of the USL

Dear Mr. USL President: While researching a match to take place this Saturday between the Miami FC and the Carolina RailHawks at Lockhart Stadium, we found ourselves aghast at the most unsettling trivia: “The RailHawk is a fictitious bird of prey that combines the speed and power of the locomotive…

Unite & Conquer

As Christina Aguilera once said, “I also love to go to art and history museums.” Wise words, friends, and if Christina Aguilera were here this Saturday, she’d surely attend the Miami-Dade incarnation of International Museum Day. Admission to all participating institutions is free, and those who sign up for new…

Cannons and Bayonets

If the United States doesn’t officially recognize May as Haitian Heritage Month, it’s ’cause the blancs are scared. Haiti, the first free black nation in the world, and the only country to gain independence by a successful slave rebellion, has plenty to be proud of. A crowd of more than…

So They Think They Can Sing

What do you get when you take Greg Grunberg and Adrian Pasdar from Heroes, Teri Hatcher and James Denton from Desperate Housewives, mop-topped Bob Guiney from The Bachelor, and Jesse Spencer and Hugh Laurie from House? Yes, the cast listing for the 2015 season of VH1’s Surreal Life, but also…

Who Got Game?

Back in the day, when gamers wanted to play together, they would grab a roll of quarters and head to the nearest arcade. But that was before home videogame consoles became so powerful they could best anything in a cabinet, all while offering the convenience of your couch. These days,…

Shall We Dance?

Chest-to-chest and hip-to-hip, two dancers tangoing is one of the most exciting spectacles to watch. Fleet-footed hoofers convey sensuality, anger, or euphoria. In Tango Undressed — the brainchild of Ray Sullivan, Miami Contemporary Dance Company’s founding artistic director and resident choreographer — the traditional dance is given a contemporary makeover…

Flower Power

If Spike Jonze and Charlie Kaufman’s 2002 film Adaptation forever ruined orchids for you by superimposing their petals over a disgusting version of Nicholas Cage, now is your chance to burn some new images into those retinas. The Redland International Orchid Show is the largest of its kind in the…

Rollin’ with the Homies

Traditional sushi is made of salted fish and fermented rice, yet somehow the gourmet goody has become a trendy part of American pop culture, and more than a few decidedly nontraditional rolls have popped up on menu pages across the nation. One bite into a bagel roll — filled with…

Antisocial Distortion

Way back in 1958, guitar legend Link Wray gave birth to the art of noise when, on a whim, he dug holes into his amp for the recording of “Rumble.” The resulting two and a half minutes of danger-laden distortion and feedback got banned, became a hit, and provided the…

Old Film, New Wave

It’s difficult to imagine the risk François Truffaut took when he made his first feature film, The 400 Blows. For several years, he’d been the harshest critic at the influential film magazine Cahiers du cinema — so harsh that his nickname was “the Gravedigger.” In 1954, he published an article…

Have Pole, Will Travel

Kingdom: Animalia; Phylum: Cordata; Class: Actinopterygii; Order: Perciformes; Family: Coryphaenidae; Genus: Coryphaena; Species: C. hippurus; a.k.a. Dolphin, a.k.a dorado, mahi-mahi, cavitos, maverikos, or lampuki, a.k.a very, very tasty when fried, grilled or blackened, a.k.a. the target of the 23rd Annual Coconuts Dolphin Fishing Tournament. A.k.a. Very much worth the short…

Poodles, Tigers, and Celebrities, Oh My

When you arrive at Galerie Adler Bertin-Toublanc this Saturday for Tigertail’s Art with Edge Party, you’ll be greeted by free valet parking and a live jug band organized by artist Clifton Childree, whom you might have seen in the March 9 issue of the New York Times. Celebrity doorpersons Merle…

Let Your Samba Party

Rose Max is no stranger to the local music scene in Miami. She’s kept busy since arriving in 1993, constantly performing and winning fans along the way. She’s won the Brazilian Press Award three times (in ’97, ’98 and ’01) for “Best Female Brazilian Singer Residing and Performing in the…

Watch Delano at the Pickle

The Electric Pickle is poised to delight downtown’s techno cognoscenti again this Friday night with a special DJ set by acclaimed DJ/Producer Alexi Delano. Chilean-born Delano spent his formative years in Sweden where he was part of the first wave of notable Swedish EDM producers in the mid-’90s. He has…

The Wheel Rolls Into Town

The category is “Event.” Eleven Letters. Solve the puzzle. _H_EL_OBI__. Give up? It’s the Wheelmobile, the touring promotional bus for the game show, The Wheel of Fortune, and it’s parked in Miami for two days this weekend. Here’s how it works: between noon and 4pm, the Wheelmobile will set up…

The Power of Five

Poetry’s already a musical art form, but how does one translate it into instrumental music? Composers have tackled the challenge for years, from Doctor Faustus to Morton Feldman. The newest among their ranks is composer Pamela Marshall, who based her newest work on the lyrics of Cuban poet Carlos Pintado…

Bringing a Little Bit of the South to South Florida

Although the old venue, Laffing Matterz, where Chrystal Hartigan’s held her event Songwriter’s Showcase, has shut its doors, the monthly event lives on at the Broward Center for the Performing Arts. Tuesday’s event will include country artist Vickie Raye, singer-songwriter Julie Forester, Mark Stephen Jones (who’s been dubbed the “Carolina…

Scene Stealers

Miami’s indie and alternative nightlife scene is arguably controlled by only a handful of promoters. While some people are perfectly content letting those promoters continue as the hegemony, others are taking their discontent and using it to give the city a truly new alternative. “People used to party so hard…