I once knew a girl from Calcutta
Whose breath stunk like old dookie butta.
Her brother loved booze
And getting tattoos
And he needed a new pair of shoes.
Their neighbor, the chef on a mission
Needed shiny new gear for his kitchen.
They lived down in Dade,
Where they worked every day,
Just for rent and electric and clothes.
So they needed a place they could go,
Seven days out the week and save dough.
Paying rock-bottom price,
Having double fun twice,
And returning with something to show.
I said, baby, hold on to your chest,
But that city up north to the west,
Got cheap mouthwash and kicks,
Cooking pots, pans, and lids,
Drive-in movies and whips,
Plus a corndog and chips,
It's the Swap Shop
You already know.