The Miami Heat took out the Toronto Raptors 102-96 in Game 1 of their Eastern Conference Semifinal despite multiple efforts to shoot explosive diarrhea from a T-shirt cannon onto the bed and let it all slip away. But Dwyane Wade, Prince’s all-time favorite NBA player, simply would not let this…
The Miami Heat needed a hero on Sunday. They got a dragon. But first, it’s worth recounting how they got there. On Friday night, it was Dwyane Wade’s majestical feats of awesome in a win-or-go-home game in Charlotte that put the Heat in yet another Game 7 on Sunday. The…
The Miami Heat’s season is on the brink. And it got there thanks to an inexplicable no-call at the end of Game Five from the referees on a blatant foul against Dwyane Wade. With 4.5 seconds remaining in the game and Miami down by two, Goran Dragic saw his three-point…
Here’s a fact: The Miami Heat have not won a playoff game since Prince died. Think about it. Here’s another fact: The officiating in the Heat’s first round series against the Charlotte Hornets has been decisively skewed towards the Hornets in a series that is now tied at 2-2. Coincidence?…
The Miami Heat — yes, the same team you’ve been watching all season — are the most face-melting offense juggernaut in these here 2016 NBA Playoffs so far. That’s the only conclusion you can reach after the heat dismantled the Charlotte Hornets for the second-straight game last night. It’s also…
Hey, yo. It’s 4/20. Know what that means? It means a whole day celebrating the gloriousness that is weed. And part of that celebrating includes three things: smoking, eating, and watching movies. Every year, you’ll see lists that tell you what the best movies to watch while high. Those will…
The Miami Heat returned to the NBA playoffs for the first time since losing that guy that left for Cleveland but still somehow can’t stay seem to away from the 305 on Sunday night, and proceeded to step inside the Charlotte Hornets’ asshole in a 123-91 Game 1 route. And,…
Pearl Jam fans, young and old, flooded the American Airlines Arena on Saturday evening for the band’s first stint in the 305 since they played Bayfront Park back in the mid-1990s. But these weren’t so much fans as a congregation. And the six men on stage weren’t so much rock…
In this week’s Miami New Times, we profile 30 of the most interesting characters in town, with portraits of each from photographer Stian Roenning. See the entire Miami New Times People Issue here. Lebo, the painter and cartoonist, stares out into the cloudless, azure sky through oversize shades, a Cheshire…
The Miami Dolphins are well into their preseason, with their last two tune-up games against the Cowboys and Rams looming. As new faces and fresh hopes start the year, one constant remains: Dolphins fans are an eclectic bunch of wacky characters. Here now are the seven types of Miami Dolphins…
Ruined, at Gablestage, Paints a Wrenching Picture of Congolese Violence
It seems like only yesterday that the Miami Marlins were the toast of baseball. They had a new stadium, new uniforms, and an entire TV show revolving around them. Cue the salsa band! Then they had to actually play games, and the result has been a season of utter embarrassment…
Closer at Main Street Playhouse Through August 12
The Turn of the Screw at Pelican Theatre Through August 12
The Hamlet Dog and Pony Show: Mad Cat Theatre’s Rollicking Circus
What makes Mad Cat Theatre’s productions stand out — aside from the tripping balls quality each play brings to the table — is the way their productions are a commentary on social mores, art, history and politics, without being specific on what the commentary actually is. Their plays are harrowingly…
Three episodes into The Franchise, shit is already getting all kinds of depressing. After two episodes of ups and downs and HEY LOOK AT OUR NEW STADIUM! wackiness, the Marlins are in a tail spin, out of the playoff hunt, reverting to a closer by committee to cover up Heath Bell’s…
William Shakespeare’s Hamlet has seen many incarnations over the centuries: Hamlet in New York. Hamlet in Havana. Hamlet in modern times. Hamlet in the Old West. Even animated Hamlet. But you’ve never seen the Bard’s tale of crazy people doing crazy things in the hands of the Mad Cat Theatre…
The Donkey Show at the Arsht Is a Midsummer Night’s Groove Thang
Last summer, we got to see fútbol powerhouse Barcelona take on Chivas, and the result was 71,080 fans showing up to watch the Mexican underdogs take down mighty Barca. SunLife Stadium (2269 Dan Marino Blvd., Miami Gardens) was a gargantuan soccer party complete with trumpets, fireworks, and fans yelling expletives…
Teatro Avante’s annual International Hispanic Theatre Festival (IHTF) — which delivers moving, diverse, and thought-provoking productions from Latino artists and playwrights — remains one of the most prominent festivals preserving Hispanic arts. And Thursday marks your last chance to see it this year. IHTF closes its 27th season in true…
I waited with 200 or so others behind the velvet rope at the door of Club Oberon. They were letting us in a handful at a time. A few of those who came to shake their groove thang were dressed for the occasion. Platform shoes, giant sunglasses, afro wigs, glittery…
