Yesterday, our boss thought it would be a good idea to take us all out for dranks. Two important things became very apparent after our third beer and second shot of whiskey: Boss Man is great; Boss Man is cruel, because while we’re all out having a great time, kickin’…
Yesterday was one hell of a washout. And Saturday, there was more humidity than we thought was physically possible. So, basically, what we’re trying to say is we can’t wait for fall to arrive so we can at least enjoy, like, two “cold fronts” and wear boots or something. #MiamiProblems…
“Is that real?” we caught ourselves thinking aloud while the lady behind the counter at Ms. Cheezious patiently waited for us to answer our own question. Jesus, it is real. Like kids waiting their turn for the ice-cream man to take their order, a small queue was forming behind us…
This weekend is all about getting your freebies on. The only thing that tastes better than the most expensive caviar is the most expensive caviar when it’s given to you for free — amiright? For the next few days, enjoy free suds at Gramps, free barbecue from Sparky’s Roadside Barbecue,…
The funny thing about weekdays is that they act like intangible shackles on our limbs. Because we know we have work and school and responsibilities the next day, we’re less likely to go out and have fun. It’s like our own form of self-induced punishment. But unless you still live…
Yasmine Kobt’s deep brown eyes have a hard time hiding her real feelings about her restaurant, Mina’s Mediterraneo. The large, airy space was a dry-cleaning facility decades ago, but when Kobt recently purchased the property, it was a skeleton of a building. In a project that took more than a…
Monday means the end of your sabbath. Yes, that alarm this morning is real — it wasn’t a dream. And, absolutely, you better believe that work is calling, your phone is blowing up from emails (curse those who reply to all), and you’re wondering why you didn’t call in sick…
At some point this week, you realized that Friday would come a little sooner than usual because most had Monday off. However, it’s still rough trying to fit five days worth of work into four. Like fitting a square into a circle — not gonna happen until you’ve got some…
When the forces that be decided that it was a good idea to have a noon game between Florida and Miami, what they were really doing was trying to see which side’s fanbase was more dedicated to their team. And so, the drinking game 12 before 12 was born. In…
“Hopefully our trendy restaurants that say they buy local stuff actually do,” Andres Barrientos says. Through their smokehouse, Miami Smokers, the Miami-born executive chef of Aaron’s Catering and sous-chef James Bowers have spent the past year experimenting and testing how the Magic City responds to special smoked pork products. What…
“We’re taking electricity from our neighbor because this bitch did not pay the electricity bill,” says Josue Garcia, dressed as his bearded drag personality Karla in his newest Youtube upload. “You wanted to go to Space, right? Well, you have to pay the price,” sasses back Gio Profera in his…
David Dubrow, a 21-year-old Miami native who spent this past summer interning at Miami New Times, has died after sustaining injuries from a house fire in Norwalk, Connecticut, last Sunday. He passed away around 1 p.m. Tuesday…
Got any plans for the evening of Friday, September 27? Let’s hope not. Cluck Miami will kick off its first annual chicken-and-champagne event that night. Along with a slew of chefs from greater Miami, the proceeds from Cluck will benefit Ronald McDonald House Charities of South Florida, which works to…
Wine sommeliers are the understated cool kids of the restaurant industry. Everyone forgets about them, but every high-end restaurant has one. Lurking in the corners of dark wine cellars, these experts are there to assist guests with ordering vino. You’d think the type of people who fall into this profession…
While the rest of Miami preps for another relaxing weekend on the beach, you’re frantically crossing things off your kids’ back-to-school check list. Number 2 pencils. Notebooks. Folders. Loose-leaf paper. Note cards. Backpacks. That horrific One Direction binder your daughter is begging for. It’s all enough to be a suitable…
You know what we realized when we woke up this morning? It’s pretty big. The magnitude of our realization is so unimaginable, we can barely function. Ready? If you’re like us, and woke up somewhere in greater Miami today, you are officially breathing the same air as Jay Z and…
Yesterday when we got into our car, the thermometer said it was 100 degrees outside. That, plus a heaping dose of humidity and a black cardigan, was enough to make us wish we lived in a city with a more temperate climate. Because Miami’s been a little too hot and…
It’s kind of been a rough news week for all of us at New Times. We sit here in our seizure zebra-striped building in Wynwood, pecking away at our keyboards, fleshing out stories, and tracking down sources to give you the most interesting stories of the day. Don’t get us…
Were you at Iron Fork last night? If you’re anyone in this town, you were there. The entire New Times staff was there. And because there were copious amounts of food and booze and acrobats and Legally Blonde performances and snow confetti, well, you can imagine how rough our morning…
Well, considering that Iron Fork and the Miami Spice Kickoff event was a bonafide hit last night, it’s safe to assume that your entire New Times staff is having just a little trouble getting into work this morning. Between the event itself and the after-parties that followed, this might have…
So we got a cat this week. His name is Oliver. He’s the most adorable thing on the planet. If you have a cat, our cat PWNS yours. Anyway, we’ll more than likely play with Oliver all weekend. However, that doesn’t mean you should sit around and wallow about it…
WWSOD. That should be the motto of everyone’s weekend. What would Short Order do? Would Short Order stay in, watch TV, munch on a bag of chips while life is happening outside? Nope. Would Short Order pass up on an invitation to brunch with friends where bottomless mimosas [and Miller…
