Ron Magill Has Thoughts on the Viral 100 Men vs. Gorilla Debate

From your grandpa's Facebook comments to Twitter's way-too-intense stan wars, the Internet has long been the site of many a useless debate. Is the dress blue or gold? (Debatable.) Did the Eras Tour really outsell the Renaissance Tour? (Yes.) Is that MS-13 tattoo real? (No.)

The latest debate to rile people up online is harder to discern, as it's of the hypothetical variety. The query dates back a couple of years, but the discussion has escalated in recent days. Inquiring minds beg to know: Who would win in a fight, 100 men or a gorilla?

The question is at least tangentially related to last year's "man vs. bear" debate, which asked women whether they'd rather be stranded in the woods with a man or a bear. (Men did not fare well in that one.) In recent days, rappers, MrBeast, and even Elon Musk have weighed in on the 100 men vs. gorilla debate, and now one crucial Miami figure has shared his take.

Rolling Stone asked several conservationists, including our own Ron Magill, to comment on the matter, and he had some complex thoughts.

For starters, Magill made it clear this is not a match-up he ever wants to see in real life.

"As a wildlife conservationist, I would never want to see this come to fruition," he told the music and culture magazine. He added that gorillas are "gentle giants" who "would avoid this conflict whenever possible."

Still, Magill answered in earnest and took the thought experiment a step further, controlling for variables including the men's ages. He told the magazine 100 healthy men in their 20s could beat a gorilla, so long as they were "committed and go in united."

But before you build an army of bros and head for the forests of Central Africa, take heed. Magill warns your gang would face significant injury, including — but not limited to — paralysis, disfigurement, "death from broken necks, severe arterial bite wounds, massive concussions leading to fatal brain bleeds, and asphyxiation from other men piling on top of them."

He got descriptive about how the gorilla might meet his theoretical downfall, too: "The group should be able to overtake the gorilla and inflict enough blunt force trauma combined with severe twisting of the head and neck while simultaneously inflicting severe abdominal punches, that the gorilla would eventually succumb to either a broken neck, internal organ damage, or asphyxiation."

Ron Magill had time today, and the man really thought this through.

"What this question proves is that some people have too much time on their hands and love to create scenarios that help feed morbid curiosity," he told Rolling Stone. "But then again, here I am playing along."