Airport 24/7: Miami: An Extremely Detailed Explanation For Long Lines at MIA Security

You've heard it every time you travel. Standing in line, waiting to be screened by the TSA, between chugging the last of your water and clumsily removing your shoes, someone around you always says it, the one infuriating thing everyone else is thinking:

"What is the point of this, anyway?"

The common knowledge answer to that question is, of course, that there is no point, and that mandatory adherence to unproven and widely variable security tactics has turned us all into trained monkeys disrobing and jumping through hoops in our bare feet. But the Travel Channel hopes to give viewers a different perspective with Airport 24/7: Miami, a new fall show that "grants ... an all-access pass inside the intense and dramatic world of one of the busiest airports in the U.S."

Debuting in October, Airport 24/7: Miami's cameras go into private areas at MIA, following the TSA agents, Customs and Border Patrol officers, and other security personnel as they make travelers' lives a living nightmare, saving us all from terrorist attacks in the process. And before you doubt the appeal of a reality show about airport management -- because who among us doesn't want to surrender more precious hours of their lives to the uniquely soul-killing experience of being in an airport? -- remember two things:

1. Shipping Wars exists, and

2. This isn't just any airport. This is Miami.

That means the stakes are higher; Airport 24/7's press release points out that MIA is a "Category X" airport, meaning it's considered a prime target for terrorism. But it also means that the passengers coming through the airport are more likely to be colorful, reality TV-ready people, by which we mean heavily drugged, batshit crazy, naturally stupid, or all of the above. In the first two episodes, the show features a passenger who tries to carry a firearm through security; a man hiding a knife in his shoe; a driver who manages to flip his car over outside the terminal; and a dog who "discovers a cache of cocaine in the least likely place." (If that coke is stashed where we think it is, it's not actually all that unlikely.)

In short, the show could surprise us. After all, Travel Channel's press release promises, "The characters of Airport 24/7: Miami embody the culture, personality and soul of their airport and their city." For that reason alone, we'll be tuning in.

Airport 24/7: Miami debuts October 2 at 9 p.m.

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