Audio By Carbonatix
The Houston Rockets are a great team full of nice guys. So we almost feel bad they’re gonna go back to Texas as crybaby losers after the Miami Heat throws them headfirst into the wood chipper and uses their blood to mulch our lawns. We’re gonna fry them up like sardines and salt them with their own tears. Then we’re going to vilify their character, nullify their strengths, and magnify their weaknesses.
We’re gonna hold up giant mirrors to their faults and laugh like maniacs at each and every error they make. And after that, we’re gonna make sure that everybody else in the world who talks about the game says the same thing.
Why? ’Cause we’re the sports media, and it’s not just our job; it’s our responsibility. But don’t feel too bad — at the end of the day, they’ll still be millionaires. The game starts at 8 p.m. Tuesday at AmericanAirlines Arena (601 Biscayne Blvd., Miami). Tickets cost $17.55 to $328. Call 800-653-8000 and visit miamiheat.com.
Tue., Oct. 21, 8 p.m., 2014
