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Blowjob Layoff

She wants to pleasure her boyfriend, but her jaw hurts.

Hello, Kitty: I love giving head to my boyfriend, but my jaw hurts and is sore for days after I do it. He doesn't ask for or expect it all the time, so I don't really want to tell him. But the pain is unbearable. It usually gets going around halfway through, and I have to take breaks, which I'm sure prolongs the process and intensifies my pain. I've never heard of anyone having the same problem. I don't know if it's something wrong with me or due to the size of his cock. Help!

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Kok Zucker

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Hey, Zucker: We have to get you into proper head-giving condition! Oral sex can be an important part of relationships, and I've seen some fall apart owing to a lack of it. So since you seem willing, let's get you able.

But first, a disclaimer: Most hos, pros, and regular broads experience no negative side effects from giving blowjobs, so your problem, Zucker, could be a medical condition such as TMJ disorder (Google it). Seeing a doctor about your pain is a very good idea if my advice doesn't work. And if your jaw hurts when you try any of my suggested techniques, stop immediately.

Now, on to my advice. Assuming your guy doesn't have an elephant dong, my guess is that your jaw just isn't used to being worked in the ways that blowjobs require. The combination of suction and movement isn't something you do every day (unless you're daily giving head or ferociously eating ice pops). So as you do with your biceps when training for an arm-wrestling match, you'll want to condition your jaw.

A prostitute once told me that chewing frozen gum is a great way to build jaw muscles. I responded that it's also a great way to look like Betsy the cow. She said that's the point.

There are also other exercises. Try opening your mouth as wide as you can while cupping your palm under your chin to give gentle resistance. Then move your lower jaw from left to right and repeat. Do anything to replicate the movements you use on your boyfriend. As with any job, you'll need experience and technique to do it well — so work on it! Meow.

Got a question? Email kitty@miaminewtimes.com, or visit blogs.miaminewtimes.com/riptide/magic_city_kitty

 
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