Sweet Ear Wax, Camel Balls, and Candy Pee: The Ten Grossest Candies Ever!

Halloween is next Monday, and with it comes trick-or-treating and candy. Candy, by its very existence, is sweet, delicious, and created solely to make you feel good.

So, of course, some genius decided that if you can mold candy into, say, a teddy bear, you can mold it into a worm. And if you can mold the candy into a worm, why not an oozing eyeball or snot or worse.

We've put together a collection of what we believe is the most disgusting, horrible, vomit-inducing collection of candy ever seen, just in time for Halloween. Enjoy!

10.Candy Toilet
The candy that comes with its own plunger. The best part about this candy is that it comes in pink, green, and blue. So when you're done with the candy, you have a place for your Barbie, GI Joe, or Spiderman to take a dump.

9. Candy Sperm
What creeps us out is the tag line on the box: "The candy you love to swallow!" All we're saying is that this candy better make like Cracker Jacks and come with a ring in the box if those little gummy sperms expect us to swallow. And who said anything about love?

8. Candy Camel Balls
This is the biggest WTF on the list. How did this product go down in the bubblegum marketing department? "Yeah, donkey balls are good, but let's go for something more exotic. Hey! How about a camel? Everyone loves a camel, and they're really hung too. Oh, and let's make them squirt red goo for extra fun and flavor." Ewww.

7. Candy Boogers
So what's the big deal about candy boogers? It's not like we all haven't eaten our own snot before. Only now we can eat them in public and they come in refreshing lemon and lime flavors.

6. Gummy Haggis
Probably the worst food ever created, haggis is a Scottish abomination of sheep's stomach stuffed with heart, liver, lungs, and oatmeal. Just thinking about it is enough to make any sane individual want to puke. So, of course, let's make it into a candy. At least it's butterscotch and not sheep's-stomach-flavored, and for that we are eternally grateful.

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Laine Doss is the food and spirits editor for Miami New Times. She has been featured on Cooking Channel's Eat Street and Food Network's Great Food Truck Race. She won an Alternative Weekly award for her feature about what it's like to wait tables.
Contact: Laine Doss

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