Every Friday, Riptide brings you the most eye-catching mugshots taken the previous week (or thereabouts) in Miami-Dade County. Yes, there is some mockery of bad neck tattoos, but also adulation directed at perps who just plain look more badass than we ever will. This is the italicized intro to that series. For mugshots from Broward and Palm Beach, check out The Pulp.
Charged with: Carrying a concealed firearm, possession of a firearm as a convicted felon, cocaine possession, marijuana possession, displaying a firearm while committing a felony
That's an impressive list of awful decisions right there, topped off by the tattoo of a flaming pile of stacks of hundreds that advertises how much of a gentleman you are. This guy is the king of awful ideas in the 305.
Charged with: Child abuse
Shirt don't lie, pal. Shirt don't lie.
Charged with: First-degree murder
I'll give this guy credit for coming up with something original for the neck tattoo, even if he did opt to get a bizarrely blobby cityscape that has a highway running across it. I hope this is the start of a new trend of future felon ink that features some nice landscape work. Maybe we'll see some Pieter Brueghels, or a J.W. Turner or two, or at least a Claude Monet.
Charged with: Battery on a police officer, resisting arrest
I imagine there was no confusion as to who to contact when they arrested this woman.
Charged with: Armed robbery, aggravated assault with a firearm
Not visible: The screws tattooed into his temples; the tiny Louis Vuitton logo tattooed on his cheek; the look of confusion, annoyance and amusement on the tattoo artist's face when this guy asked for all those things on top of the TRILLA on his neck.
Charged with: Battery
I'm not saying this guy got arrested after a brawl at a strip club because the guy two tables over wouldn't stop slagging on Whitesnake. But if I told you that was the reason for his arrest ... well, you'd buy it, right?
Charged with: Cocaine possession
Getting arrested in a Minnesota Timberwolves jersey is as loud a cry for help as possible. That's like wearing stained sweatpants to a wedding.
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Charged with: Battery, trespassing
This is the most uncomfortable close-up in history. Any more zoom and we would have been able to make out the hairs in this dude's nose. Miami-Dade intake photographers: Back up, please.