As her show comes to a close after 25 years, we are not only saddened,
but can't help but realize how she has shaped all of our lives in
different ways. So in the name of all this is holy, we give you the
reasons why Oprah is the best woman alive.
8. She Chooses the President.
OK, maybe McCain choosing Palin set up his loosing fate, but let's be honest here: When Oprah Winfrey said she was voting for Barack Obama, many people started to think twice about their vote. I mean, Jesus- she controls the New York Times Best Seller List (Oprah's Book Club, anyone?) so it was just a matter of time before she controlled our government as well.
7. It's OK to Have Some Meat on You (Because Oprah Does).
Season after season, we watch her go from a size 2 to 20 back to 2. But do any of us really care? She could be the fattest women in America and people would still tune in to watch her. Not only does it not matter what size she is, but it made women finally start to accept that yes, maybe they were a little overweight, but who gives a shit? The richest woman in America has booty and so can we.
6. You Don't Say No to Oprah.
Every time a big story hits the news, every reporter is trying to get
that person to talk to him or her first. But we
all know who is going to get the first interview: Ms. Winfrey. Because
if Oprah wants to talk to you about your scandal (John Edwards
mistress) or you lying in your book (anyone remember James Frey's A
Million Little Pieces verbal beat down by Op?) not only will you talk
to her, but you will answer every damn question she wants you to.
Everyone calls themselves a "baller" these days. They think by buying a diamond chain that they have put themselves on the money map. Want to know who owns that map? Oprah. In 2008, the woman made $275 million dollars. In 2009, Forbes reported that she is worth about $2.3 billion. She's the first black woman billionaire in world history. Want to know the best part of that title? She earned every goddamn penny herself. And for that, we tip our hat to her.
4. Marriage? Eh, Who Needs It.
With people like Khloe Kardashian marrying their significant other after one month together, we're forced to question the whole institution. Know who beat the system? Oprah and Stedman. For the first time, many of us saw two people that not only have stayed together longer than most couples we know, but they did it without a marriage license. And we have to love that the woman is the one bringing home the bacon and their relationship still has lasted this long.
3. Every Mother Loves Oprah
There are very few mothers who don't watch or love Oprah. Many of us have watched the show for years because when we got home from school, our moms were glued to the boob tube. Even though Oprah more than likely made your mother cry at least three times a week, it was great to have mom 100% occupied during the afternoon. Nothing like a little distraction for mom when you needed to get into a little midday mischief.
2. She Will Out Charity You Any day.
No one does philanthropy like Ms. Oprah Winfrey. Her Oprah's Angel Network has raised more than $51 million dollars since 1998. And what makes her a serious charity bad ass? Winfrey personally covers all administrative costs associated with the charity, so 100% of the money goes to those in need. Let's not even mention her school in South Africa called Oprah Winfrey Leadership Academy For Girls. She calls them her "daughters," which were pretty made every woman in America want to be a small African girl so very badly.
1. You Want Something? Oprah Will Give It to You for Free.
If we were a Make-A-Wish kid, we know exactly what we would ask for: Oprah's Favorite Things. Any woman (or man) for that matter wants to be there for that show. It's harder to get into then the White House (which apparently isn't that hard, right Real Housewives of DC?). Brad Pitt even made a call into Oprah to get his mom in and she denied the request. If she wanted to give every member of her audience a humpback whale, we're 99% sure her interns would go out and find them. On last Monday's premiere of her final show, she gave everyone a trip to Australia on a plane flown by John Travolta. On her 19th season, everyone got a car. And about every other week, she is paying off someone's mortgage or bringing in their long lost family that they haven't seen in 20+ years. You want something? Oprah will get it for ya.