Food News

The Original Crab House: Sketchy GPS Treats Us to Malnourished Blue Crab

Not to be confused with

The Crab House in North Miami Beach, The Original Crab House, is located in Kendall at the end of an

unassuming strip mall off US 1 and SW 98th Street. The place lacks any view of water. This should have been a

warning sign. But with crab on our minds and a desire to test uncharted

waters, we entered and found a dining room consisting of

seven tables covered in newspapers. Walls were adorned in harpoons, a taxidermy swordfish, and plaques that looked as if they had been yanked

off the walls of a New England inn.

The husband (co-owner, host, waiter, busser)

greeted us with menus while we had a straight-shot view of the wife

cooking in the kitchen. Appetizers ranged from $4.95 (raw oysters) to

$14.95 (jumbo cocktail shrimp) and also included clam chowder ($3.95

for a cup, $4.95 for a bowl).

Crab is all we came for. Almost all of

the seafood prices were listed as "market price." So when we

inquired about the Alaskan king crab legs ($59.95) and Alaskan snow

crab legs ($29.95), the husband retrieved plastic wrapped crab legs

from the freezer and brought them over. They weren't the

meatiest-looking crab legs, so the price seemed high.

We settled upon the regular bowl

($29.95) of original garlic blue crabs in herbs, spices, and garlic

sauce; ($39.95 for the jumbo bowl). As we waited, we could hear nothing but the sweet sounds of

Simon & Garfunkel overhead and the snapping of crab shells as our

fellow crab-eaters dug into their bowls.

The owner prepped us by putting on our

plastic bibs. He seemed to relish the role. He also seemed to notice

that we weren't quite enjoying the nearly meatless blue claws. I asked

where he obtained them and he replied "the Everglades," adding, "we didn't know we could get them there, but

when they ran out on the east coast of Florida, we found them

there..." He knew they were runt crabs and explained that because

it's winter, they're smaller, When it gets warmer, the crabs they

find will be larger, he said.

Your best bet is to not leave finding a

crab house to the lottery of GPS as we did. Maybe instead you should wait for summer and head for the Glades. 

The Original Crab

9636 SW 77th

Avenue, Miami

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John Zur