Well, well, well. Who woulda thought that the notoriously Southern Paula Deen was actually a Cuban-American in disguise? Oh, no wait -- she isn't. It just seems that way, since like many of our abuelitas, she has been suffering from diabetes while pushing sugar-laden goodies down our eager throats for years.
My own abuela, Cuban and diabetic through and through, could not stop eating (and making) flan, arroz blanco, and Cuban bread -- all very, very bad food stuffs for people with diabetes. But my grandma, like Paula Deen says, would "not let diabetes stand in the way of enjoying" her life.
Although foodies are in a furor over the news that Deen hid her illness three years while continuing to peddle unhealthy food recipes, the truth is that her illness is her business and no one else's. Whether she is a diabetic, a practicing Santera, or collects Beany Babies, is really none of our concern.
What gets my stewed goat however, are the following two statements she made after the 'scandal' broke out:
"People see me cooking all these wonderful, Southern, fattening recipes ... it's for entertainment. People have to be responsible."
For entertainment? Really, Paula? No, Booboo Crazy Eyes, you know full well that you encouraged, cajoled, and fully expected for us to try and recreate your unhealthy, rich, diabetes- and obesity-producing recipes.
And...
"You can have diabetes and have a piece of cake. You cannot have diabetes and eat a whole cake."
As a person who also struggles with type II diabetes, I'm just gonna flat out call Paula Deen a no-good, stinkin', liar. We cannot eat a slice of cake -- unless it's a no-sugar or low-sugar recipe. We can have a bite of cake, maybe even two or three, but an entire slice of cake would make our sugar spike which could lead to several immediate health problems, including coma and blindness.
Her decision to "come out" was obviously fueled by her new contract to serve as the spokesperson for a diabetes medication and everyone knows how strategically ambitious Paula Deen is.
Just ask Anthony Bourdain, who stated in an interview with Eater, "Clearly this has been coming for a while. She's been looking for ways to position herself." He also called Deen, "the worst, most dangerous person to America."
I wouldn't go that far, Tony. But she is a sneaky, money and fame hungry, little heifer that should not be trusted. Unlike abuela.
Enjoy this somewhat unrelated video of Deen getting hit in the face by a flying ham:
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