The best thing about living in Miami is that it's practically summer all year long. But every great thing comes at a cost, and for us, that is hurricane season. From tomorrow until November 30 (hurricane season!), we need to get our butts in gear and make sure our refrigerators and cabinets are locked and loaded in case of an emergency.
But first, we drink.
Category 3 Wine?
Head on down to Schnebly's Winery this weekend and go for a tasting tour. Over the weekends, tours cost just $7. From 12 p.m. to 4 p.m., a guide will walk you through the estate and explain the history of the Schnebly family. But best of all: the tastings! Tasting tours cost $9.95 and include five samplings of Schnebly's best. For this occasion, we recommend making friends with the winery's three appropriately-named wines: Cat 2 White, Cat 3 Hurricane, and Cat 2 Hurricane Red. Cat 2 White is made with coconut and avocado, while Cat 3 Hurricane is a more exotic blend of tropical fruits with notes of citrus. Cat 2 Hurricane Red is made with avocado and guava -- but all three will blow you away. So hunker down and start sipping.
When was the last time you were at Fat Tuesday?
We know. The thought of sauntering around the beach with one of those big Fat Tuesday buckets with the handle doesn't seem the least bit appealing. But, hear us out. For the next few months, the weather is going to get really sassy with us. One minute you'll be enjoying a breezy brunch on an outdoor patio somewhere, and the next minute you're waiting for Noah to pick you up from the Great Flood. So relax a little, grab a big ol' hurricane at FT and spend the weekend at the beach while you still can. Erosion isn't cute, but, during hurricane season, it is inevitable.
Weather's looking a little dark and stormy.
Having spent some time working in Arizona, we worked on a bar project where we asked a bunch of bartenders to emulate a haboob in the form of a cocktail. "Haboob" is the Arabic term for sandstorms, which happen relatively frequently. Some bartenders used actual sugar to imitate the sand. Some used chamomile dust to imitate the dustiness of the storm. But here in Miami, we don't need to challenge bartenders to making weather cocktails. They already exist, and they're kind of perfect for this season. Enter a favorite: The dark 'n' stormy. Few drinks and better and easier to make, especially when you consider every summer afternoon is usually dark and stormy in Miami. Radio Bar in SoBe has a tasty one for $12.
Funnel Cakes without the fair.
Did you know that if you Google "funnel cakes miami" one of the first search results that pops up is Barton G? If you did know, you're on the path to success in life. Funnel cakes at Barton G restaurant are a show on a plate. The cakes comes with chocolate, strawberry, and caramel dipping sauces, spiced powdered sugar, and freshly whipped cream. Yes, it will be the most expensive funnel cake you've ever had ($36) but it's sort of a once-in-a-lifetime experience thing and you might as well do it before a funnel pokes down from the sky during a storm, anyway.
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Whether the U is your alma mater, or you're just a die-hard fan, this weekend, of all weekends, is the most befitting time to hang out with the real Canes. Surely the favorite bars like Titanic, Bougainvillea's, and Fox's will be less packed now that a bunch of the students have gone home for the summer, but that just means there's more room for you at the bar, and more booze. So it all works out.
Follow Alex on Twitter @ARodWrites.