Martha Stewart on Real Life = Great Comedy (Videos)

Martha Stewart has joined The 71-year-old domestic diva is looking for love on the Internet dating site. While it's great to think that Martha is actually looking for love, one has to wonder just how sincere the whole process is.

While there really is a profile on (and Martha herself has written a blog about posting a profile with the help of a few dating gurus -- including Match's CEO Sam Yagan), Stewart has tied the profile in with the release of her new book, Living the Good Long Life.

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- Martha Stewart Talks SoBeWFF, Love of Florida, and Vegetarian Meals

Her profile name is "thegoodlonglife" and she insists she's sincere. Although it's a shameless tie-in to her new book title. it's quite possible that Martha is so good at marketing herself, she's doing this branding subconsciously.

On her profile, Stewart is looking for a man 55-70, and says that she's a social drinker. Stewart's hobbies include "cooking, dining out, fishing/hunting, gardening/landscaping, movies/videos, museums and art, shopping/antiques, and travel/sightseeing". She considers herself "very liberal".

In any event, it's great entertainment -- not only for watching Stewart, who told Matt Lauer on Today that she's weeded out 20,000 profile views to two men she could have coffee with. She also confided that this whole online dating thing is time-consuming, and that she has "gardens to plant and horses to ride".

Martha's entire dating dilemma is extremely entertaining, not only to follow her actual search for a companion, but for watching the spoofs that evolve from Stewart's attempts to find true love (and another New York Times bestseller):

Conan O'Brien's version of Martha's profile includes directives on how to have sex with the domestic diva (every 44 days, lasting exactly 12 minutes, 30 seconds). In this video, Martha also ensures a romantic mood by placing candles in homemade holders made from artichokes.

Saturday Night Live's Kate McKinnon stars as Stewart in a commercial, where Martha is looking for a man with "calloused hands and no debt".

Personally, I'm rooting for Stewart to find someone on the internet to ride her horses off into the sunset with. In any event, a Martha Stewart how-to on on-line dating would be a sure-fire hit...and more comedy gold.

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Laine Doss is the food and spirits editor for Miami New Times. She has been featured on Cooking Channel's Eat Street and Food Network's Great Food Truck Race. She won an Alternative Weekly award for her feature about what it's like to wait tables.
Contact: Laine Doss