New A-Rod Claims: High School Juicer, Poor Tipper, Bitch Tits

Selena Roberts made a name for herself by breaking the Alex Rodriguez steroid story, but, dammit, she has a book to sell, so she saved just a little bit of hot, juicy gossip for her tome. The New York Daily News got a hold of an advance copy of the...

By Kyle Munzenrieder

April 30, 2009

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Selena Roberts made a name for herself by breaking the Alex Rodriguez steroid story, but, dammit, she has a book to sell, so she saved just a little bit of hot, juicy gossip for her tome.

The New York Daily News got a hold of an advance copy of the book and says it includes claims that A-Rod juiced in high school and might have continued the nasty habit well into his career with the Yankees.

The evidence? Well, Yankees players nicknamed Rodriguez "Bitch Tits," because anabolic steroids give you rounder, more feminine pectorals. He might have also been seen at the same time in the same place as tainted taint-monster Kevin Brown and some HGH.

Other sources claim A-Rod's high school career at Westminster Christian was also marked by steroid use. He put on 25 pounds of muscle between his sophomore and junior years, and a former teammate claims that even the coach knew he was juicing.

There's also other assorted damning accusations in the book, like how once he tipped only 15 percent at Hooters. This man is a monster! People with big tits gotta look out for their own, Alex.

By the way, Roberts's book, A-Rod, hits stores May 12. She would like you to buy it so she can continue to shatter your illusion of the integrity of professional sports and its star athletes.

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