Choose your own terrible crime adventure: Ricardo Davis was driving his girlfriend to work at Taco Bell this week just up the coast in Palm Bay when the couple started to argue. The girlfriend pushed Davis' head, so he responded by a) Calmly telling her to cool off; b) Singing the lyrics to "Bandz A Make Her Dance" loudly enough to drown her out; or c) Viciously biting off her thumb and spitting it on the floor.
Well, this is Florida, so you already know that Option C is the winner.
Police in Palm Bay say Davis and the girlfriend, who hasn't been identified, started arguing on the way to the fast food chain where she worked when things turned violent.
"During the course of the drive down to work, they got into a verbal argument, and she basically became upset. She kind of pushed his head, and he responded by biting," Yvonne Martinez, a department spokeswoman, tells Florida Today. "He bit (her thumb) completely off and spit it out on the floorboard."
The girlfriend rushed to the hospital, where a nurse called police as doctors tried to reattach her thumb.
"The woman continued to say, 'I can't believe he bit my finger off,'" Martinez tells Florida Today.
Ultimately, doctors weren't able to save the thumb, and police tracked Davis down to his home.
The thumb-biter, who is 35 years old, now faces a charge of aggravated battery.
Follow Miami New Times on Facebook and Twitter @MiamiNewTimes.
